"Today Is The 5th Day Of July In The Year Of Our Lords 2012."

It Is Now Post Time.
We're Off...Woke up this morning, and what to my wandering eyes should appear, but a bunch of critters drinking vodka and beer. The Ville was sparkling all red white and blue.. The critters were screaming,,,,.HEY PLAINT AND SAMPLE DIS IST FOR YOU!!!!
Thanks, Sammy, Blat, Slat, The Goat and the MeereKat too.. as for the parrot fuck you...ARK! fuck you too, fuck you too...In reality (yeah right), it wouldn't be a whole lot of critter fun without that annoying bag of shit...
Hi everybody, welcome back from the 4th today be Thirstday and Tomorrow be VodkaDay, yay..You know if you read the top of this post, I am a poet...I have the heart of a barbarian, the blood of the Romans and Nazis,,the body of a young Adonis, and the mind of a fucking nut.!!!!!!
Hope you had a good time in the Ville yesterday, man we are getting a lot of visitors.. In fact the Beuracrats in Blogington, asked me if I wanted to take this Ville to Hollywood...I said sure, but they said it would have to be just Simple.....I told them fuck you, without Plain there ain't no Simple...Whack on my whacky brother...Who loves ya kid..The Holidays bring out the best in me...especially the HOT ones...Little known fact, on this date, before The Year Of Our Lord was even thought of..The HOT N' TOTS, became a tribe..yep, before that there were two distinctly different peoples that dropped from the trees.. The HOTS who got their name because they could survive in the HOTTEST of environments. Their hair was thin and as they evolved,  they shed it very quickly it made them even more acclimated to the HOT climate of the jungle..they were not a large people, but they brought down large prey, because the prey were dying of thirst in the heat.....The TOTS on the other side of the jungle dropped onto the ground and survived and flourished because they were very small, thus TOTS, Yep that is why we call our small children TOTS..The TOTS could actually live under a few leaves and gulp down beatles (John, Paul, George, they didn't like Ringos)..(don't worry General I am getting help soon.) I digress, they also gulped down various other bugs...It was inevitable as evolution took hold in the jungle that these two tribes would meet...The male TOTS , evolved into a chiseled bunch of hunters, very majestic, fast, athletic and man their sexual prowess knew no equal, they grew in stature and uhmmm genitallically (for those of you, I may have lost with that word,, you know their dick and balls)  The HOTS females, well they became the first HOTTIES, and as we all know their breasts, and their legs and well other womanly thingies... were unparrelled in jungle lore......One morning a HOT woman was forraging for whatever the fuck it is you forrage for, and she stumbles into a trap set by a TOT warrior.. Well when he saw her and she saw him, fucking sparks flew to Borneo...He ripped her out of the trap and they were FORNICATING ON THE JUNGLE FLOOR FOR DAYS!! HER SCREAMS AND HIS GRUNTS, brought the other HOT AND THE TOTS running from every bush and tree in the vicintity.. Well when they laid eyes on each other, the first HOT AND TOT orgy was on.. Nine months later on July 5th the first HOT N' TOT was born, they named him TOT N' HOT.. AND FROM THAT DAY FORTH, THE TWO TRIBES BECAME ONE..."THE HOT N' TOTS.. AND IF YOU LIVE NEAR A JUNGLE, YOU CAN STILL HEAR THEIR SCREAMS AND GRUNTS ON THEIR ANNUAL FIFTH OF JULY ORGY........You heard it here first on Plain and Simple...