"Today Is The 19th Day Of June Of In The Year Of Our Lord 2011."

Mornin, Happy Fathers Day Dad (RIP) you were the best. To all the fathers in Plain and Simpleville have a great day.  I went out this morning figuring it was a nice day too treat the critters and the Slavs to a barbeque, so I brought some walnuts wrapped up in corn husks for Sammy, I had some pumpkin seeds for Greeny and was going to throw these really nice pork chops on for Blat and Slat, I even had some cat food to grill for Mere, and I was going to give Billy the Goat all the left overs in a nice tin can.  Well I walk over to the wood pile too get the two big bags of charcoal I bought and the starter fluid, when I get there they are gone all of a sudden I hear this voracious fart.  The fucking goat ate the charcoal and the lighter fluid he was farting hot charcoals and flames. Everybody ducked for cover, Blat hit his head and drove the nail in further.  Greeny was flying around in circles.  ARK!! He is shitting fire, He is shitting fire.  Sammy let out one loud GRRRRRRR!! and dove in his hole. Mere was on fire and jumped in the pond. Me, I ran across the street to get my rifle because this is the day they all fuckin die.  When I got back Blat poked his head out of their burnt tent, and I am telling you the only part of the nail sticking out of his head was the head..  Slat was yelling that FOOKIN GOOT IST GONNA KEEL SUMBODY!!! I lost it. I yelled you ain't gotta worry about no goat I'm killing all of you today.  With this I fell this lump on my back and these little teethe gnawing at my neck. Yep Sam attacked me .  Mere jumped up on his toes and punched me in my nuts. The Slavs were laughing so hard they whacked each other on the back and got in a hugh fight.  I grabbed my rifle and sprinted across the street to my bunker.  Jumped in and peeked out  the window. Yep, there was Mere, standing on his toes staring at me. I can't take it anymore, I gotta get outta this place.  I'm gone back to the rack, already a tough day at the Ville. Hey if you had any tough days throw them out there, I know everyday is tough for Plain, what the fuck he wakes up whackin his balls. That is a bad way to start the day.. Bring it on Plain and Simpletons, talk too you later.  Hope your day starts off better than mine.  Please go the fuck away Mere....