"Today Is The 31st Day Of October (HALLOWEEN) In The Year Of Our Lord 2011."

"It Is Now Post Time."
We're Off.  Big Big Day for the younger parents, and their little ones.. Big day for everybody that is still a kid at heart.  I remember one fateful Hallween Party where Simple really pulled a good stunt..Yep, I was treasurer for the Pediactric Liver Research Foundation at Children's Hospital in Philadelphia, and every year I would have a Halloween party to raise money for the foundation..Well, this one Halloween I get dressed as a Super Rabbit (yeah Dave), I sorta looked like Hip Hop before Hip Hop looked like Hip Hop..Some of the people that were also officers in the Foundation were my brother-in-law Phillip and his wife Donna. Anyway we are at the Halloween Party and Simple is doing what Simple does, imbibing in cool beverages. Now, don't forget everybody is in disguise..At this time I had an ex-jockey working for me, one Leo Lucky  Murray, should have been Unlucky Murray.. The only ball buster I know that is a bigger ball buster than Lucky, is Plain..Anyway, I am drinking it up under my rabbit mask, and this Ninja type warrior keeps fucking with me.  You know pushing and garbling shit about a punk rabbit and all that kinda shit..I say stop, it Lucky, quit fuckin with me. Get another drink and the Ninja takes it and drinks it.. Quit fuckin with me Lucky..Steps on my foot.  With this I take a flying leap at who I think is Lucky, and knock the Ninja and me to the floor where the Ninja starts moaning and grasping its back.. It was none other than my sister-in-law Donna's Aunt who just had back surgery.. Well, needless too say Simple was a little shook up, not only from hitting the floor, but realizing I just lost my house, car and income for the next ten years.. Of course I ripped off my mask and was yelling that I thought it was Lucky, I thought it was Lucky!!!!  Lucky came out of the costumed crowd dressed as a jockey, and says, Hey Unlucky, it wasn't me.. Just another party in the life of a Simpleton...Donna's Aunt decided not to sue, as she was taken from the party in a wheel chair, smiling and drunk...Of course my ex had some choice words for the crazy rabbit.., as I was led from the party still yelling I thought it was LUCKY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Anything Halloween guys it is here.. Be careful of the little ghouls and goblins tonite, another candy high....

It is the 31st of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2011

Hmmmmmmmmmm Well I was Totally  wrong  the Eagles  beat My  Cowboys ass .Out Played  them  in every  facet  of  the  Game. But  it  wont  be  the  first  time  I  have  wrong. yep  I  know  I  know   but  there  was another  time.I thought  I  was  wrong  but I  wasn't but I counted it anyway.But I'll give ya a quiz to  show  how  sometimes  we can  be  wrong. You  have  to  get at  least 4 right  to Pass.
1  How  long  was  the  100 years  war.
2 where are panama hats made.
3 Where do  we  get catgut
4 What was  the canary Islands named after
5 When does Russia celebrate  the October revlution.
6 What is a Camel's hair brush  made  from.
7 What was King George the VI's first name.
8 What color is Purple Finch.
9 Where  are Chinese Gooseberries from.
10 What color is the Black Box in an airplabe.
     Rember  you need to get at  least  4  right  to Pass.

Answers:
1 116 years
2 Ecuador
3 Sheep and Horses
4 Dogs
5 November
6 Squirrel's fur
7 Albert
8 Crimson
9 New Zeland
10 Orange
         So how  did you  do ? Liar smirks  and  walks  away!

It is the 30th of October In The Year of Our Lord 2011

Well Simple is  still on the Road he  was  driving  North  from Toms River  he  thinks  in a Place  called Boston right  now, and Phil the Thrill keeps repeating " if  you go  up you have to  come  down" and Simple  is  saying HUH?. They shpould  be  back  by tomorrow if they come  down.

        Now Andy Reid is 12 and  0  comming  off a Bye they will be 12 and 1 after today for  a  few  reasons, they  only played 4  teams  with a winning  record after their  byes  and  one  of them rested  there  players because  of  the playoffs,another  reason  is Dallas  should  be  undefeated.The  cowboys  will  knock Vick  out  of  the  game, maybe  the Season and I'm going smirk.I  know  alot  of  peple  hate    America's team (smirks) but   it's  only  because  there so Good, But  now  people  hate fat ass Reid and  Vick  even  more for good  reason there both Scum bags and  so  is  half their Gangsta team.. Gooooooooooooo cowboys Looks  up at  my  pal Irish and  smirks.

It is the 29th of October in the Beer of Our Lord 2011

Hmmmmmmmmmm Cracks  my Knuckles, as I do  all the work around  here and  have to cover for Simple Again.He on his way to the Casino, driving  thru  the Storm,he's meeting Phil the thrill from Cherry Hill I know  Phil will tell him  something profound  like we Drove  down we gotta Drive back  up.

        Well Kids it was in the Cards , Texas couldn't Hold em.I hear so  many saying game 6 was the greatest  game  they  ever saw!!!!! No way it set baseball back 100 years I see lil Leagers  catch better  than  that. Exciting yes sir reee bobalouie no doubt about it as   for excitement, but Defence they both  sucked. Let me  know  what you  think.But it  was  a  very good  Series  and  i'm glad the Cards won , just  for  Albert Puiois sake he is truly a Gentleman  and  treats  the  lil  People Great especially  the  handicapped,He's  just  a  Good  Guy  and  not  like  most of the prima Donnas in the Game today.

         

Post-Vodka Day, October 29, 2011 A.D.

Not a good October day.........Can you find Waldo, er a Simple, coming home from the Casino................

"Today Is The 28th And Last VodkaDay Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2011.

"It Is Now Post Time."
"We're Off."  It's in the Cards Plain.  I hated too fall asleep on that one, but Phil The Thrill told me it was one of the most exciting World Series Games he ever saw.. On again tonite...Weekend at Ernie's, trip to the shore to sign a friend into a room at Bally's, then leave, yeah right.. The last time I singned a friend in we sent his wife home and we were there for three days.  Ain't happening, (only because of cash), maybe one day..Halloweek moves on. We broke a record here at Plain and Simple on Wednesday, we had 127 visitors.  I think it is time to take the Ville Hollywood. If McFinn and Carol will meet me at ECK'S one Friday for lunch and show me how to do pictures, we would bust out onto the national scene.  Maybe next week Finn.., Have you noticed, I'm sure you have that Oprah is doing inteviews again.. I beg, one more time. Please your majesty, please go away, take your fucking weight programs, your interviews, your own tv station, your legions of loyal worshippers and get the FUCK OUT!! PULEEEEZZEE!!! Can't stand that no talent bitch..You know deep down she is a bitch.., and Martha Stewart is one of the nicest people you can meet.. GAG!!!! Yo, how about Oprah, is she related to the queen. They both look like they never shit..They should put them in a laxative commercial.. Here is Oprah in the morning taking Brother John's little laxative pill, look at her scrunched up face.  See how she is bent over and holding her stomach, this is due to cramping from not shitting for seven years..Now watch as Brother John's Little Laxative Pill kicks in...UMPH, UMPH!! FFFFRRRRRRRRRAAARRRT!!  GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE WAY!!!!!!!!!!!!CLEAR THE HEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YEOW!!!!! Yes ladies and gentleman that is Oprah that just ran through the bathroom door, as you can see her extra spacious toilet is now engrossed in ebody, as she sits, shits, and grunts. That a girl let it fly Opry...Her multi-billion dollar condo building is being evacuated, the people are gasping and fainting in the streets...Here she comes now.. Oprah! Oprah! how was your first bowel movement in seven years.. Oh Anderson, I must tell you and your loyal viewers here on CNN, that the Little Pill really works.. I was so constipated that I had to start taking Xanax for anxiety. I was sure I would explode.. Which I almost did.., but for all of you constipated people out there that never smile, and are always miserable take it from me Oprah Free Winfrey, get Little John's Little Laxative Pill,,Oprah, Oprah!! Psst! Brother John's.. I am sorry I meant, Brother John's Little Laxative Pill, it sure does work, look at the smile on my face..I feel like a cement mixer that just unloaded.. Thank You Oprah, you can pick your 15 million dollar check up at the desk..I am sure you will build anothe orphanage or hospital.. Now, PULLLEEEZE GO THE FUCK AWAY!! FLUSH THE FUCKIN TOILET AND LEAVE!!!  Phew!! the shit I gotta put up with around here..WHERE THE FUCK IS THE GENERAL!!! WHERE THE FUCK IS PLAIN!!!!  We will be heading for England next week, the queen has promised to do a commercial for Brother John's Little Laxative Pill, man if she shits Europe will tremble..  Remember people that Plain and Simple do not authorize any of these products here at the Ville, but if you would like to try it make sure you are near a shitter..Now, let's continue Halloweek with a much clearer mind and sphincter..  Vincent Price and Edgar Allen Poe, have to come to mind this week. Vincent for his miserable perfomances in any movie he was ever in, and Poe for that ever Macabre writing he produced while fired up on coke, and not the soda.. Where is everybody.. Hey Earman, how about saying hello..as for the rest of ya, enjoy the day...

Vodka Day, October 28th, 2011 A.D.

Simple's Vodka day and He will probably end up at the Sugar Place.  This is his date for the Hollowed weekend and the main reason he goes to the Sugar Place.  Does he keep her in the trunk?  Do the critters know about her, I think not.  CALL FOR PHILLIP MOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOIIIIIIIIIISSSSSSSSS.  Or maybe it is just a Morris he needs............Plain no relation I hope........

"Today Is the 27th Day Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2011.

"It Is Now Post Time."
We're Off..That is Plain, is off, if he is whacking today, hope he wore his rubbers..Remember them rubbers, not those, the ones you had to wear over your shoes, they took like an hour to get on and off.. Took mine and threw them down a culbert..sewer, for those of you that don't know culbert.LOL.. Anyway talking about rubbers.. They have them on the pitchers mound, they have them at CVS and they have them at foul weather gear stores..Yep there is many uses for rubber and rubbers..I wonder if they called them rubbers, because they were made from rubber or they rubbed her..This profound subject has been on my mind ever since I blew my first one up, and thought it was a midget balloon..Anyway, what were we talking about?? Oh Yeah, The Exorcist.. I remember when that movie first came out. I had read the book, and being brought up to realize that I had no shot of heaven. I figured this was my fate..The only time I really saw anyone look like that was at Turella's around midnight on a Friday, or Monday.. I remember that movie scaring the shit out of a lot of Catholics, it was supposedly based on a true story...Hey, I guess if you believe in your God, you gotta believe in the Devil...I remember one question asked in Theology Class at LaSalle.  I had a monsigneur for a teacher, and I remember asking him.. If God is all good and all knowing, why did he create evil?  I never will forget his reply.. He told us that without a front, there cannot be a back..If God created good, there had to be evil.. In other words hot-cold without one there cannot be the other..I thought about it then and I think about it very little now, but I guess that is as good an explanation as anyone can come up with.. If you got a better one let me hear it.., and Halloweek continues...Any new monsters?? of course not...We as humans cannot think of something that never existed....BRING IT PLAIN.. AND WHERE THE FUCK IS THE GENERAL??? I know he came back from Florida he was sitting in front of me on the PLAIN, or maybe that was Mario...

27th of October, 2011 A.D. Thirstday

Guess we should start some Holiday pics.      Lets start off with a classic, our girl Linda........Went to see this movies at an opening at the Samson and another couple ent with us and there was only single seating by the time we got there.  We all got separated and I was stuck with between two humongous girls who were choking on their Mike and Ikes.  Had to watch it again later to enjoy it...........

"Today Is The 26th Day Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2011."

"It Is Now Post Time."
"We're Off."  Plain musta really been whackin yesterday, he didn't even pay a visit to the Ville..He doesn't care if he hurts our feelings. I am here everyday (cough) (cough), slaveing away at the Ville, cleaning and scrubbing and killing spiders, and last night a whole lot of critters if they didn't get the fuck away from me..Outta here later, Dave Morris has a Bulldog, named,, Drum Roll Easy............................................Lance Corporal Rodney Morris.. Anybody that knows anything about The Marine Corps knows that the Bulldog is The Marine Corps Mascot.  In fact 3/4 of my Platoon had the Bulldog tatooed on their arms.  I was actually next in line at a tatoo joint in San Juan, when one Lucy Travaersso, grabbed me and said Jimbo and Cunswaylo, were waiting. So, I didn't get the tatoo. I know my man Monk has it.. Anyway, The Marine Corps Birthday is November 10, and there is a rather large celebration at one Cookie's Tavern (R.I.P.) Marines from all over the area gather for the party.. Well baby, this year Lance Corporal Rodney Morris is going with us..I am taking the sweater (Red) that Dave bought him and having one Kathy Rippert of Rippert's Tailoring sew U. S. M. C. Gold letters onto the sweater.. We also have a helmet and a doo rag, and goggles, for Rodney.. If we don't make the news there ain't no fuckin news.. I know Rodney better be prepared to take a lot of pictures.. I know Hot Rod (that's his nickname) pretty well as having bonded with him one weekend, when Dave and Phyllis went to the Casino.. I had short pants that weekend and just chilled at the house with Rodney.. Being a Sunday, I watched footballl and around seven headed to Del's for a Cheese Steak and a Hoagie for Rodney.. I didn't know Rodney wasn't allowed upstairs, so when I hit the rack I brought him with me and gave him the hoagie..I guess he wasn't that hungry as he left half of it under the bed, which wasn't found for another week or two.. Italian hoagies can put off a  pretty offensive smell after a week..I get a call from Dave. Yo were you eating a hoagie under the bed, and did you take Rodney upstairs?? AH!! When?? THE TIME YOU STAYED HERE WITH HIM!!! Calm down young fella, I stayed there quite a few times..THE TIME ME AND PHYLLIS WENT TO THE CASINO!!! Oh yeah, he came upstairs with me and had a hoagie..HE DIDN'T EAT THE HOAGIE AND HE AIN'T ALLOWED UPSTAIRS!!! Calm down old friend.. CALM DOWN, YOU TWO LEFT THE HOAGIE UNDER THE BED, AND NOW HE STANDS ON THE END OF MY BED BARKIN UNTIL I PICK HIM UP AND PUT HIM IN BED WITH ME!!! Wait a minute, what do you mean us two, I ate my half, you should have trained him better than that....See ya over the weekend.. I don't know how they stand me, or better yet I don't know how somebody in the old home town hasn't killed me yet...Anyway you know I am great at predictions. I am going to start keeping score..So far, 1 and 1. Here is my prediction.  Lance Corporal Rodney Morris will be the hit of The Marine Corps Birthday party.. I would love to take him out on Halloween but Strebor wouldn't  let me in...
Back to Halloween week..there is no more Holiday it is Holiweek.. Including Birthweek. It is impossible to get done everything that everybody wants to do in a day..The decorations for Halloween are incredible. It was never like this when I was a kid.. It was a big day, although three years in a row my candy got robbed, in the same spot on the Manayunk wall. The fourth year they tried but I went out dressed as a baseball player, with glove, ball and BAT!! Yep, BAT came in handy. In fact it came in handy quite a few times..
Speaking of Bats, little known fact, they call a baseball bat a bat, because when people first started swinging sticks at bats, the stick always had a branch sticking out of it and when someone nailed a bat, the other people would yell, you got a bat on your stick, or later on you got a bat in your hands.. Thus the term bat became synonoumous with swinging.., you heard it here first on Plain and Simple..In case you haven't seen any original movies lately, let me suggest a few.. Last nite, Halloween IIII  was showing on the movie channel. This movie has to do with a homicidal maniac that escapes from his homicidal maniac digs and kills everybody that he can catch.. He is one of the slowest fucks I have ever seen.., not quite as slow as the Mummy, but slow..He cannot, do you hear me, cannot be killed, they have hit this bastard with everything but an A Bomb.. Maybe we need Harry Truman back....

Today is the tomorrow we worried about yesterday...26th October

I heard from a reliable source that I cannot devulge, priviledge you know, that the coffee mishaps don't always happen at WAWA.   You nuts are never safe....Nobody is safe when Simple is drinking his JO..............

"Today Is The 25th Day Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2011."

"It Is Now Post Time."
"We're Off." And out  the gate they come.. Simple in his loin cloth takes the early lead, Greeny is flying, but Sammy is flying faster of the rail..Mere is toeing the line, and the goat has his horn in the lead.. The slavs are wiping up the rear (for the first time.)  TWO MONTHS TILL CHRISTMAS!!!, yesiree get them credit cards caught up as much as possible so you can max them out for another year..That Holiday is more of a horror day than Halloween..  Anyhow, this is Halloween week.. I devoted a week to Halloween here at the Ville, because most people that visit say this place is like a nightmare.. I must say true.. Can, you imagine, people trying to vistit and reading about flying squirells, and ARKING parrots, and Slavs, drunken goats, Mere Kats, and Plain and Simple guys.. They just cruise right by thinking what the fuck was that????
That was like when the Marines stormed Iwo Jima in World War II, that slice of an Island off the coast of Japan cost about 10,000 Marine Corps Casualties.. Next step invade Japan.. Harry Truman, says how many Marines did we lose on Iwo? They tell him the dead and wounded count.. He says, we will lose 500,000 U.S. military trying to invade Japan.. Don't we have that bomb? They said yes sir, the atom bomb..He said drop it.. They did, and it hit next to this old Japs hut and they say his last words were:  "WHAT DA FUCK WAS DAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Ain't any around like the old haberdasherie salesman now a days.. He is what this country needs.. Harry didn't fuck around and the buck did stop there..One of my all time favorite Presidents..When the country had great leadership, but I know that after Mr. Truman it was all down hill and still sliding..
If you had too get dressed up this Halloween what costume would you wear.. I think I would go out as Hannibal Lector that way I just slick my hair back at go out...Sniffing at women, telling them I can smell you Clarice..Well let me know, who you would get dressed up as, and Plain, please don't say a guy riding on a trike with a yellow slicker. I  know there are no rules but that ain't gonna count...
See ya later...

t

Today is Tuesday, the 25th Day of October, 2011 A.D.

Thought I would just show why Plain and Simple should NEVER go to St. John's Reunion......................

"Today Is The 24th Day Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2011."

"It Is Now Post Time."
"We're Off."  Hey Plain, I ain't comPLAINing, but I had a really crazy Monday morning. Maybe, just maybe one fuckin day before you go whack your balls into the ground, you could maybe, just maybe find it your black heart to do a post. OH NO!! Simple, I have to go whack my balls throughout Manayunk. Whack on Plain, man is fucking incorrigible..
Yo!! how about that Halloween shit,  see where the driver of one of the hay wagons was a little tipsy, they the wagon was a little tipsy.. Here is a dumb fuck, that is a drug addict..That is my definition of a drug addict.. He is smashed and he is driving innocent men, women, and children around a dark ass field in the middle of nowhere, there is no excuse for that kinda behavior.. Get your shit together man, you wanna drink, go drink, you wanna drug, go drug.. You pay for it, you do it in the proper setting and leave other people the fuck alone.. This idiot coulda killed somebody..Man, you know I ain't against drinkin. I ain't against much. I just don't like puttin  your shit on other people.. You know like stealing off them so you can go buy your drug of choice.. If you can't afford your habits get rid of them..Fuckin people piss me off..
Back to Halloween. Well actually today I have to mention Christmas.. Why?? You ask, because Christmas Eve is two months away today.. You believe that.. It is true if today is really the 24th.. Whack the fuck off Plain, what hole is your balls on now?  Called him the other night, his wife is as bad as him. She told me he was eating apple pie.. I said Whoaaaa!! homemade apple pie? She says yep.. Puts him on the phone. I say, Yo, wifey made you home made applepie.. He said Yeah, right from tastykake....My mouth was watering for a piece of homemade apple pie.., had to go to WaWa and get a tastykake apple pie.. Not bad..Hey Plain thanks for the advice, actually won a couple pots at Texas Hold Em. That was a first.. Plain told me too play smart, but I must admit. I was pullin some snakes. I was ready to roll to SugarHouse or Boat or whatever, but Phil The Thrill was like, you Ern, your winning here.. So I stayed and, yeah I won..
Onto a show I saw, no new monsters by the way.. The Walking Dead.. Once again bunch of humanity that was killed by some kinda virus comes back from the dead craving human flesh.. I want to make one where all of humanity croaks out and comes back craving parrot and squirrel flesh.. Greeny!! Sammy!! why you runnin you two little fuckers..Phew the shit I gotta put up with around here..Halloween week keep bringing it..
Hi Catey.

Today is another day in a month with an R in it..... Follow Simple he knows what day it is........RIGHT

Today is Untied Nations Day and I thought I would just give a small pictural on why WE are the most powerful Nation in the World and we have to do it almost entirely on our own and where some of the Honest money is going: Check out the Pilot., Kara Wade.   I would let her on my ship.  We won't go back to when Men were Men and Ships were made of wood.....LOL  This is why we all did our time.................

"Today Is The 22nd Day Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2011."

"It Is Now Post Time."
"We're Off."  No braggadocia intended, but I consider myself a pretty good poker player. Now, I must contradict myself, already, because of that Texas Hold Em game. I am not a good Texas Hold Em player..Or I wasn't a good Texas Hold Em player, because last night I kicked ass. Won the first two pots then, put Phil The Thrill in for the next one and went and watched the ball game. Number one I never quit, but I just don't like game. So, I left a winner.., really not a bad feeling.  I should try it more often..
World Series Time, and I know Philadelphia still has a bad taste about baseball, but we gotta let it go. It is over it is done, and just like every other disappointment in life you move on.. I think one of the main faults with anybody that likes sports is the fact that they connect so passionately with their team (especially in Philly), and in most instances those teams and players don't really give a fuck about the fans.. They are a greedy lot that play for themselves and in most cases the owners and their teamates, then maybe the fans.  The sad part about the Phillies, and I am a long time Phillies fan, I honestly felt that this team connected with the city and with the fans..I mean it was like a triumvarate.  The ownership, The team, The fans..So I think that in this way it is so frustrating to the fans, they really are a big part of this teams success. I also would like to say, don't give it up, it is still going to be another fun season, and I once again am looking forward to spring training..If Dave Morris is still thanking people on his 38th birthday, I gotta get his take on the Series.. Cardinals or Texas?? I got a feeling he likes the Cardinals..Probably pretty even, but the Cardinals hold the Puhols Card, the biggest Trump Card inal of them all..
You did it again Finn, wishing old Dave, a happy birthday!!lol...You seem too fuck up daily.. Can't wait to see what you do tomorrow, Tuesday the 26th day of June In The Year Of Our Lord 2011.
Football, no Piglles,, good.. Now that they beat Washington, the Philly scribes have them winning out, ain't happening.
Basketball, labor strife..Pulllleeeeeeeezzzeee!!!!!!!! You have to work to perform the act of labor..You fucks don't work you play.. When are these greedy moron owners and players (not workers) going to get the formula, you play half a year for so many millions of dollars, if you are smart your family is set for generations to come, so come on in and play...PLAY!!!!!!!!! While they are having labor strife (GAG), they should have to go to West Virginia,, and work the mines until they sign the new agreement, it would be signed tomorrow..
I gotta pat myself on the back, and eat some crow, ewwww!! Though I have eaten worse.
Did predict the Miami heat would not win the NBA championship, and did predict that Dallas would..
Did predict the 2011 Philadelphia Phillies would win The World Fucking Championship..so a bad 1 for 2.
Lazy day, back to WORK, here that you pampered fucks... WORK, you don't know what it is.. Shootin a basketball for a living, they make me sick..Play while you figure out how you get another million a year.. Entertain us that is all you are good for...
Well by now we all know Kadaffy Duck is dead.. Now, I think they are hunting for his children.. Good luck with that shit.  He probably has about 2000 of them.
OK guys today, being the week before Halloween, lets start bringing out the costumes..and everything connected to what has become the second biggest commercialized Holiday, next to Christmas..
Prediction time:  I think the biggest selling mask for this coming Halloween will be the Casey Anthony mask.. Remember her.. yeah right, the sheople just  move on, and that baby killer is enjoying her life. Don't think for one minute that she has any kinda guilt or remorse.. She doesn't, she is a total narcissistic, hedonistic, psycho.. On that not enjoy Halloween week. We will be like AMC and have a whole week of the Macab What the fuck it is already Macab around here.. I heard Strebor is secretly sending Blat love smoke signals....

Today is Uhh Uhh a Sunday in Ocotber....I think.....

Today we are going to honor DAM, one of Simple's best friends with a belated Birthday wish.  Happy Birthday David from the Citizens of the Ville.  As we can see your dog has already given you his present and you put it in a bag..........Happy B'Day..

"HEY McFINN!!! Today Is the 22nd Day Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2011."

"It Is Now Post Time."
We're Off,  What the fuck McCool, it ain't bad enough that I am doing this with aching head. I gotta stop and say wait, today is the 22nd isn't it?? God have mercy on the man that doubts what he is sure of... I had to go check the paper.. You know Jim, having you back is great. I just am not sure if you know you are back..You and Strebor are more or less the steadying influence on that lunatic that rides around here on a trike, but come on man, you gotta get on the ball with days and months and years..I know I put us in the wrong time zone, but that is because I Am Simple Lord Of The Simpletons...lol..Fuckin guy.....
Alright, having vented on that old sailor it is time to do some sailing.. I took a cruise yesterday..PHEW!! I have many, many, many, many, many things to thank The Good Lord for in my life, and one of them is Phil The Thrill From Cherry Hill.. I mean the man loves everything I love in this life.. he loves going to Manayunk and seeing all the guys.. He loves all sports,especially horse racing.  He loves the poker machines and can hang with the best of them...and DRUM ROLL EASY............................................................HE DOESN'T DRINK!!!!! I have other friends that love all the same, and they don't drink either, but their wives know me to well to let them hang out with me all the time...LOL!!!  Anyway me and the Thrill start out at the refinery what a fuckin business that is.. and naturally wind up at ECKS for lunch and a few beers.  Owed some money stop up another club in town..spend the money before I pay it back..Wind up in East Norriton at my cousins..watchin wheel of fortune.. I say, why we watchin it lets go play it.. My cousin says not this week, I know he whacked it pretty good one week, but I didn't ask if they got it back.. Anyway that saved me from SugarBoat or House or whatever the fuck that place is called.. Beautiful Saturday, good weather for all the kids playing football, for us anyday on the right side of the sod is a good day...Looks like the Ville is up and running and like I said, I wish I could devote more time too it, as without me this place is a fucking disaster.. Could you imagine Plain and McFinn, or McFinn and Strebor.. or Strebor and Plain.. They wouldn't last a week without Simple.. So, on that note... I AM GETTING THE FUCK OUTTA HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Wait till they read that.  You gotta admit I might be Simple, no I am Simple, but I got some balls baby......BRING it PLAIN, FINN, and STREBOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today is Saturday, the 21st Day of October, 2011 A.D.

WAKE UP PLAIN>>>WAKE UP PLAIN>>>>>>>>It is only a DREAM you were having..............

"Today Is The 21st Day Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2011."

"It Is Now Post Time."
"We're Off."  DING, DONG, THE DUCK IS DEAD, THE WICKED DUCK, THE FUCKED UP DUCK, DING DONG THE WICKED DUCK IS DEAAAAAAAAAAAADD, HI HO, THE DAIRIO, THE WIKED DUCK, KADAFFY DUCK, DING DONG THE WICKED DUCK IS DEAAAAADDD!!!!! Alright!! Alright!! Sammy, Blat all of you get the fuck out of my bunker....Phew, what I gotta put up with around this place..What the critters at the Ville don't know is, that in reality another beast has bought it, the only downside to that is who takes over..It seemed in the last few years the Duck was under control, at least as far as the world was concerned.. Of course, we the sheople don't really know that, so today here at Plain and Simple let's just go with what we are being fed, the world is a better place without the good old colonel.. Like Plain said this stupid fuck took over a country and only made himself a colonel..What the hell when me and Plain were smarter than that, when we took over the Ville we at least remained Lance Corporals, we didn't strut around like we were Corporals or anything resembling an NCO..So, lets see the count continues.. Sadamn Insane, Osama Bin Coward, now Kadaffy Duck they say these things happen in threes.  Believe it, as I have seen this happen in threes many times.. I hope this is an exception and it happens in the tens of thousands or how ever many it takes to rid future generations of cowards that prey on innocent people.  Sons-Of-Bitches like this have been haunting mankind since the inception of mankind became and epic event in the world as we know it. You know how new mans existence is to this globe. Hell 5000 years ago, nobody could read or write..Now they are having that same problem in inner cities around our country..Cliche time, what goes around comes around. In the year twenty five twenty five if man is still alive if woman can survive they may find. No one can read or write, everyone just wants to fight. All the madmen have returned, all the cities they have burned,  will humanity ever learn,  a way to live in harmony, I doubt it as you can see, even in the year twenty five twenty five, they cannot let the sheople be.....Yep, the history of mankind is inundated with mans inhumanity to his fellow man...Started out with the chiefs, went righ on down to the priests, the ruling family, the royalty, the emperors, the warlords, now it is politicians..I don't have the answers on a way of governing that would be a source of good for everyone. I just know they haven't found one in 5000 years.. As of right now, you might not like what we have, and neither do I, but it seems to be the best man has come up with so far...
OK, enough of my dalliance on everything mankind.. IT IS VODKADAY..Yep, first one since Florida, of course that was just last week, but me being without vodka for a week is like Plain being without his balls.. Whack on oh great whackers of Manayunk, maybe I will get a chance today to hear all your wondrous tales of how good you hit your balls.. I just wonder, doesn't that hurt?? Anyway what to do today, this Simpleton is heading for the refinery. I will not be back...I mean back to the Ville, there is no shot of me getting refined.. As we head into the weekend before all the scary shit.. See if you guys know any other bad guys that got their just desert whatever the fuck that means..Use those wondrous minds the Good Lord, and Your Mom and Dads gave you and think my friends think, what bad guy got what was coming to him or didn't.. I kind of like didn't..
1.  You know like Adolph, did his own ass in, could you imagine if the Russians got ahold of him and Eva, hey that would be a good book...
2. Atilla, I want to say Attila died at fifty-two in his tent, waiting to rape, pillage and plunder another village.. That wasn't to bad for the worst Hun that ever lived.
3. Every child molester that is in jail or out,  they should all be dead..
4. How about the Manson gang, they are all still alive. That one witch, Susan Atkins aka Sadie Mae Glutz may have bought it with cancer, not sure, but that still is not pay back enough for what those bunch of maniacal jerk offs did..
Come on in, give some bad guys and gals their just due. Or just do.. I really don't care what you do.. I am outta here and on the road.. If I can grab a puter later, I will if not someone please do TAPS..Have a great day....

Vodka Day, October 21, 2011 A.D.

WOW. What a great day in the Ville yesterday.  Everything that the Ville stands for was covered with the integrity and conviction that comes from the very fiber of their souls.  NICE TO BE BACK on the controversial track again.  Good job!!!!!!!!!!

Today we have Simple lining up some orange slices for a fresh Screwdriver for Vodka Day, and his little friends are going to help him out..........The bugs that follow that man around..........

You know what today is , I'm not sure so follow Simple

Todays pics have a twofold purpose....One is recruiting and one is self explanatory:  One is I am trying to get Catey back by explaining what really happened to her when Plain and Simple put their spell on her then proceeded to chide her about her misfortune, or maybe not?  Catey, IT IS GOOD TO BE BACK.  So, come on back!!!!!!!!!!

"Today Is The 20th Day Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2011."

"It Is Now Post Time"
We're Off..YO!! I am on to something big, here at the Ville..Before I get started, just let me tell you about these fucking spiders.. I open the bunker door to make a head call, and in runs this fucking spider, I mean fast, right past me into the bunker..you think I could find that bastard. This after killing three of them, really pissed me off, of course it was 1 AM, and I am down on the floor stabbing under a 1904 lb. couch that Goliath couldn't move. Finally just went back to sleep, figured if the bastard bites me there is a 50-50 chance I might wake up..I mean I have woken up in many, many locations around this globe with insect bites all over me, and in some instances I never even woke up, while they were feasting on my exhausted ass.., and the rest of me..OK! as I stated, in my opening comment.  I think I am on to something big..Yeah once again the sheople never cease to amaze me with that statement. IT IS GOOD TO BE BACK.. This statement is usually made after coming back to the drudgeries of everyday life, you know alarm clocks (which I don't need anymore as I am up half the fuckin night anyway), and hurrying around either to get the kids ready for school or shovel snow out of the driveway, or in some New Yorkers case sit in traffic for two hours to get to a job they hate.. Most of the time this statement is made when they just got back from a trip to Disney Land, or some Island in the Sun where they got totally ripped the fuck off and won't know it until the credit card comes do..Sometimes they are coming back from some kind of trip they had planned for a couple of years, their skiing adventure in the Alps or a once in a lifetime safari to Africa or whatever.. Why the fuck is it good to be back... I took a one week vacation in South Florida last week, and I didn't hear one guy say IT WAS GOOD TO BE BACK.  Now, I am talking about twelve loons that make more sense too me than almost anybody in this fucking universe.. We weren't all that thrilled to get back.. I know I coulda stayed in that local for a few more months.., anyway in  my opinion the only time it is really good to get back, is if you have been away doing something that is good to get away from.. You know like being in a fuckin combat zone, or a earthquake damaged city, something of that nature, then sure it is GOOD TO GET BACK!, but come on, good to get back from Disney when your kids are little, you may never get to experience that again..I just can't help it. I personally hate when good times are over..No matter what you say, that time will never occur again in the same manner.  You may have similar times on the horizon but no two trips, no two meetings, no reunions are ever the same. Some may be better than others, some may be worse, some may be different locals. You get my drift.. Once you have an experience that you loved, don't try and recapture it, you can't.. You have to make new experiences, and who knows you might like that one better than the one you can't recapture..OK I think that GLAD TO BE BACK, statement when applied to vacations or life time dream trips or in general doing something you really like is a bogus statement..I never used it, and I don't think I ever will...You guys got any more bogus statements, or statements that make no sense whatsoever......, or just statements that irk you for some reason.. Come on in have some fun...Let me hear those wondrous musings about fucked up statements, sheople say...
1. "Lets Have A Beer"  get the fuck out of here.. Lets have a beer ain't happening, not around here, why don't you just say lets go to the bar for five hours.. There is no such thing in my realm as lets have a beer..
2. Did you see the way she was dressed?  This is usually a woman thing, as I personally could give a shit how anybody dresses..and if she was dressed in a low cut or high cut dress or skirt, your fucking right I saw how she was dressed.
Don't those two make you sick? Not really, if they made me sick I wouldn't be around them. If they make you sick why don't you get the fuck out..
BRING IT!!!!  Gotta get some work done....Later..

"Today Is The 19th Day Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2011."

"It Is Now Post Time."
"We're Off."  Yessiree. Is yessiree a word?  Hey Blat is yessiree a word?  ......................................................................................................................................................................................Blat!!Yas Sample, I ist thanking!!  Yassireee!! Thank you Blat.  Phew what I go through around this place..
OK.. A subject I was trying hard to broach but can't.. The Phightin's go down 1-0. Halladay give up the one run, they get tossed from the playoffs..This all the day before vacation.. I really look forward to the days that me and my brothers can all be together and watch a sporting event.. None more than the Phillies in the playoffs, or better yet the World Series.. I even had an old Cliff Lee shirt in my duffel bag..Yeah, I don't have a suitcase..So, we kinda left on a sour note, but what really was amazing, no one brought up the game that had just gotten over five hours before we met at the airport.. It was like no one wanted to talk about it.. That my friends is true Philadelphia.. It was like we talked around it the whole time we waited for the PLAIN to take off. Even on the trip if it was mentioned, you sorta got a wave of the hand, like I don't feel like talking about it..Hey, me either., but here at Plain and Simple, I have to express my opinion.. I honestly didn't see or read any Phillies news the whole time I was away..I really didn't watch that much TV, and I naturally didn't hear the local ballyhoo, about what happened..I did catch up a little when I got home, but honestly not much.  So, this is just my take on The Philadelphia Phillies Players and organization..Baseball is really a strange game.. It honestly does set you up for failure..The best players bat in the 300's.  That means they fail 2 out of three times..If that were the real world. you wouldn't last a month...So, starting from there, let me just say, and this is not sour grapes.. I think the regular season, should be cut back to 156 games again..I also think the playoffs all should be 7 game series.., this would def. give the teams that won the most games an advantage, as they well deserve, because they won more games during the grind that is the regular season..It won't happen, the way I would like too see, but I could see them still playing the 162 games and having 7 game playoffs.. That may happen, it won't help the 2010 or 2011 Phillies, those seasons are history..OK, what I did hear and read since my return was get rid of this player.  I even read a column where they compared Charie Manuel to Andy Fucking Reid, are you kidding me.. Charlie Manuel and Andy Reid are so far apart in their appoach to life, and coaching styles that this article was just a figment of someones imagination.. Number one Charlie Manuel is a West Viginia guy, that will throw back a shot and a beer with anyone at anytime,  he is loyal not only to his players but too his hometown in West Virginia, where he said he will one day retire to.. Let me tell anyone that thinks Manuel should leave.. You better hope not.. Reid on the other hand is a Morman, how many Mormans do most Philadelphians know, and how many Philadelphians know anything about the Mormons in General.. Let me just put it this way, he isn't, now nor will he ever be anything like anybody we know.. Go the fuck back to Bringham Young and teach them the Andy Reid version of the west coast offense.. He sickens me, with his pompous fucking attitude and all knowing demeanor, about anything, anywhere related to his universe.. Get out Piggy.....You better hope he does, because there will be no Super Bowl under this administration..If they had lost Sunday, I wonder if Beetle Juice would have been under the scope to get rid of his fat ass...
Back to the Phils. Basically leave them alone..The pitching staff is the best in baseball, and can only get better with the infusion of the young bucks that helped them this year...Around the horn..First Base, is going to be Ryan Howard, who after rehab, should be hitting 30 or more home runs and driving in 100 or more RBI'S in the regular season.. Has he been a bust in the playoffs? Yes, somewhat, but so has the whole team.. He is still, and will be an integral part of this organization for many years, like it or not he is here..Second Base, you
have, one of the biggest gamer, and team leader this town has ever seen, he is only 32 years old. Has Chase Utley been injured? Of course, has it robbed him of his power and his baseball knowledge?? I guess his power maybe in some degree, but I am not even sure of that. I think that he will be back as strong and play up too his capabilities at a high degree for at least another five years.. If his body holds out, he will go down in Phillies history as their greatest second baseman of all times.. Gotta run be back later, for your thoughts and inspirations on anything Phillies...

Today is Wednesday, the 19th Day of October, 2011 A.D.

I suppose this pic sums up the feelings of the Merry Men and probably should be their Motto. LOL

"Today Is The 18th Day Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2011."

"It Is Now Post Time.
"We're Off"  Or to put it more bluntly, we are really off.. When does it stop.. I don't really know anybody that is in their sixty's or seventies and act like they are still 21, except my friends.  I don't count because I act like I am 12...I have a lot of tales too tell.  I can't get started right now..,except for one of my favorites.  A little known face.  Fort Myers Island was once the hideout of the infamous pirate, Calico Jack.. You may never have heard of Calico Jack, but he is one interesting dude.. He is not as famous, per say, as a Sir Francis Drake (The Greatest Pirate That Ever Sailed The High Seas.), nor a BlackBeard. (Richard Treach) or even Captain Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp), but he is noted for something that none of these fellows was every recorded doing..  Number 1.  Calico Jack did not only attack Merchant Ships.. He attacked any ship that ventured into his large realm in The Gulf Of Mexico.. He attacked private vessels, military vessels, pleasure ships, in other words any ship that happened ot be in his scope.., but his real claim too fame was his deck mates were no other than Ann Bonny, and another female pirate that went by the name of Terrible O. because she never revealed her identity as a woman, until a sword fight broke out and she was cut on her right breast...When Calico Jack found this out, he did not have her walk the plank..He was already banging Ann Bonny, so he just invited Terrible O into the bedroom and had the first recorded Menage A Trois on the High Seas... You heard it hear first on Plain and Simple.  My salute to Calico Jack is a straight with no chaser. (Just like the best Accapella group I have heard in years.)  of Captain Morgan Spiced Rum... MMMM!

Today is Tuesday, the 18th Day of October, 2011 A.D.

Don't worry I know Plain and Simple will be checking in today.  As you can see Simple is still trying to get his head up off the floor.  Plain is trying to get his stroke back........Patience good citizens the musings will resume........Today.........

Today is Monday the 17th Day of October, 2011 A.D.

SIMPLE wake up....the party is over.........Plain break 80 today.........or has jet lag set in upon our two sages........great work yesterday but you can't stop there......the citizens are depending on you for details and pics, if you have any.......Please the people need you..........I beleive this picture describes how you feel and what you are doing.  I think it is you looking from the bunker to see if the critters are still around before you dare step outside...................Good Luck........a concerned citizen.........Plain the trike is in the shed if you go down to check on Simple...........

"Today Is The 16th Day Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2011."

"It Is Now Post Time."
We're Off.. Man, there is no doubt about that..If one thing is ever for sure in this life, those loons and brothers, I grew up with are definetly off.  When I say off. I mean OFF! This is not what people would consider a normal group, but what makes it really unique is the fact that we don't give a fuck what most people think.. I can't get into everything right now, as my head feels like that old style deep sea helmet Dave had on his head last week.., but I got a lot of stories.  Real quick.. Watched the Phillies go down 1-0.. I can't even begin to go there yet.. So therefore I hit the rack roughly around 1AM Friday nite.. Stare at the ceiling for about 3 hours, then jump out of the rack shower up, and Phil takes me too the airport at 5 AM.. Board said Plain with no, sleep.. Naturally Me, Floyd, and Dave grab last class..Hit the Steward up with 60.00, and begin too down vodka and orange juice for breakfast..I must admit by the time he said we were flying over Washington, I was well on my way to a super buzz..I do not, and I will admit this remember landing in Florida.  I just remember going into my impersonation of Al Pacino, in Scent of A Woman.. I was told there were a lot of people staring and laughing and a lot of people staring in disgust.. Once again I don't give a fuck what most people think..I do remember the security guard, grabbing me, and I do remember a few of my laughing cohorts, saying, he is fine he is just doing impersonations.. Like that is fine in an airport..Luckily the Securtiy Guy loved the movie, especially my rendition of the scene in the Baird School..LOL!! Anyway me and him wind up huggin and they somehow get me in the van..There I proceeded on with my impersonation as we had about a 40 minute drive too our destination..Some of the guys said I was pleading with the driver too let me drive..Lot's more too come.. Carpre Diem...That either means, seize the day, or one of those strange looking fish that was pulled into our pontoon boat on some God forsaken lagoon somewhere off the Gulf Of Mexico....

Today is Sunday, the 16th of October and the 29th Sunday of Ordinary Time, 2011 A.D.

I thought that it would be wise to advertise that the Ville has a Day Care just in case we have any two working parents who need some help.  This Day Care is free, but it is a BYOB........It is staffed by professionals hand picked by Plain and Simple:

SIMPLE WAKE THE FUCK UP:

It has been like groundhog day around here.  Tumble weed rolling through the Ville.  Strebor came back from one of the Naples and there was some activity but that was it.  So when your blood level reaches your alcohol level  start telling us about your adventure with the Merry Men. 

"Today Is I Don't Fucking Care What Day It Is."

The reason I don't care what fucking day it is, is because I am fatigued. I have too much blood in my alcohol..  It is so quiet in the Ville that it is scary.. I am walking around and there are a few squirrel turds and parrot shit, and Mere Kat markings, a few Slavic looking toe nails, signs of goat rutting, but no critters.. What the fuck is going on here.. I was only gone for what seems like a year or two..
SURPRISE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!SAMPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hey guys!!!!!!! Downt Goos Sample  HA AHA AHHAH!!! Ve Mist U Sample... Get the fuck off me man.  Quit kissin me Blat, the General was doing that all week.. We found the General!!!!! Ow fuckin goat, knock it off... Ow!!! NOT ME SLAT.. SAM SAM.. Punch Punch, Jab, Hook, Uppercut.. You little son-of-a-bitch.. Stay down Sample HAHHAHAHAHHAHA.. Fuuuucuucucucuucckkkkk.... MERE help... get me in the bunker...thanks Mere.. GET THE FUCK OFF ME... AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Goodnite....

Today is the 15th Day of October, 2011 A. D.

Don't know what you can expect when you walk in today.  One week is a long time.  We tried to keep the critters under control, to no avail.

I told Strebor not to worry about the place but she insisted on sprucing up the place.  But you know her, she wants you to come home to a fairly clean bunker.  Hope you had a safe trip and a fun vacation. 

Today is the 14th Day of October, 2011 A.D.

Whew.........Just got back from and early run to the Ville to check on the critters and make sure they are still alive.  Low and behold Billy got a hold of Simple's credit card and got himself a new set of braces.  I guess he found out that chewing on his friends toes ruined his teeth.  He took care of that and God knows what else.  They all seemed pretty much burnt out but nobody said they were going to clean up, and as a matter of fact a lot of them were getting ready to scram before Simple comes home Saturday.  They wanted to get as far away as possible.  It looked like a Petting Zoo down there and smelled like one two.  So I just put the trike back looked around, shook my head and left.  It should be fun when The Merry Men come home.  Can't wait to hear about their adventure.  Have a good wet day and make the best of it..........anticipating the Musings, just wonder how long it will take them to come back to their senses.............

Today is the 13th Day of October, 2011 A.D.

WOW, as you can see Sammy has lost it.  He said he is getting ready for Simple to return because he knows the they are all in trouble.  The place is in shambles.  Most of them were passed out.  When I go down on Friday I was going to clean up a little but screw it.  I am just going to make sure none of them are Dead.  I hope that the Merry Men had as much fun as the critters did.  I guess they will be back sometime on Saturday, so keep an eye on the News Saturday and Sunday for Breaking News when Simple arrives back at the Bunker.  Two more days and the crazy musing will resume.  I suppose Plain got thrown out of the Library.  He said he might be there a lot and come in on remote.  Figures..............Have a good day and GO FLYERS.............LOL   

Today is the 12th day of October, 2011 A.D.

Today I make another trip to the Ville.  Can't wait to see if they cleaned up a little like I asked them to do.........LOL Yeah right.  Most of the critters and their friends didn't even know where they were.  Hope all is well witht he Merry Men.  Been watching Action News and World News and haven't seen anything about them so far.  Well, let me get going.  Will BBL with a report............

Today is Tuesday, October 11th, 2011 A.D.

Went to the Ville yesterday and as you can see the Mere was acting up with a couple of friends he brought along.  Rode the Trike around and it was a mess.  The goat overbooked the bunker and the party spread throughout the Ville.  ARK ARK was his usual self......trying to control everyone which didn't happen.  Sammy was having a ball hanging out at the nut bowl.  Slav and Blat were doing gymnastics all over the pines.  God only knows what other guests I will find there on Wednesday.  Will keep you up to date on the happenings.  If you want to stop in help yourself.  Just use the password: Simple, and it is bring your own dish.  Good luck..........

Today is Monday the 10th Day of October, 2011 A. D.

Why do they let these guys into Florida or any other state in this country?

I hope the rain has let up in Florida, especially Naples.  You know they all will be singing "Rainy Days and Mondays Always Get Me Down".  But in reality I think nothing will get that Merry Bunch down.  They will adjust. And Plain will just be in the Library longer.  Making my first trip to the Ville today and see how bad the critters did over the weekend.  They know they have a week so we shall see.  I don't know where Plain keeps his Trike so I will bring my own.   Will let you know how I make out.

Today is Sunday, October 9th, 2011 A.D.

 
Good Morning............Hope all is well with the Merry Men.  I cannot keep up with the Musings of our two famous Sages, nor would I try.  Today we have the Eagles getting blown out by Buffalo.  I hear it is raining in Florida so there will be Neon Tans...Plain is going to put a lot of time in the Library polishing up on his Plethera of Knowledge.  Simple will be doing his Vodka tasting and trying to find a yet to be discovered new way to use Vodka.  So, ramble on today about anything........Oh yes, I forgot, the Boys ran into Dr. Phil and invited him over and after a while he couldn't take it any more and left them with this thought:

Today is Saturday, October 8th, 2011 A.D. Departure Day

Well today the Merry Men depart on their annual Trek to find the Fountain of Youth.  They are probably in the Air as we speak.  Where they are all going is a puzzle.  Simple might be going to see Strebor and the rest are going South or the rest are going to see Strebor and Simple is flying South.  They have been known to trip Simple up, likes thats a problem. We all wish them a safe trip there and back, and I am sure a good time will be had by all.  I am going to visit the Ville Monday, Wednesday and Friday.  Like that will mean anything but I want to make sure the Menagerie leaves the shell of the bunker intact.

As for the Promising Phillies, they showed us a good time all year.  Set all kinds of records and were picked to go all the way.  Who is to BLAME?  I don't know.  Doc did his job with one mistake......Carpenter did his job with no mistakes.  No hitting for us and not much hitting for them, just enough.  1 freaking run.  Was it Sammy not running around.  So I guess we should all vent about what we think was the problem.  Have fun and vent.  That is why we are here.............

Today is Vodka Day, October 7th, 2011 A.D. The Eve of the Merry Men's Departure

Well one more day and over to the Ville we go.  The Goat said 2 bucks right?  Yep .  For the whole week?  Yep.  Okey Dokey.........Parteeeeeee Time...............

"Today Is The 7th Day Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2011."

"It Is Now Post Time"
We're Off...Let me check my exacta, ok got a 2/7 box..Simple, Simple, Simple, wake up you crazy child, your too ambitious for a juvenile.. Yeah, Yeah, Simple!! your dreamin man. It is not really post time you are at the Ville.. OH! Man I thought I was at the race track with Bob Dylan.. We were both young and he was giving me his phone number up the Poconos where he retired. He said bring every body from the Ville up tomorrow night and we will do Tamborine Man.. I said Bob, I would love too, but I will be in Naples, Italy tomorrow night, with my brothers and my friends.. Sorry... THAT'S RIGHT!! except for the night part. I will be there early in the AM..Gotta get the whole day in.. Count down to, I finally found out, Naples Florida, 1 day.. In fact not even, by this time tomorrow we will be in Florida wondering why we are not in Italy.. Oh well,  good to get away,  no matter where we go there we are..Jimmy Mc take care of the Ville as best as possible.. Me and Plain might be a little or a lot remote tomorrow.. As for everybody else, wait till you hear mine and Dylans new album..

Today is Giovedi, October 6, 2011 A.D.

The Fly is a great lunch for spiders.  They serve a purpose to spread germs to boost your immune system.  In the old days when the garbage man would come around if you looked in that can, you are right nothing but maggots.  But then we had less colds and diseases than we do now.  Why? The Fly.  From the time we were kids our parents would say put this in the garbage can.  Rotten job, but a little know fact every time we opened that garbage can we got an immune system boost.  I give some Fly pics from the beginning, the Soldier Fly, the Circus Fly, finally the Funeral for the Fly.  Ergo, don't be so hard on the fly.  The can sense it and keep bothering you until SWAT...........................   

"Today Is The 6th Day Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2011."

"It Is Now Post Time."
We're Off..Well, we will be off in 2 days..Thirteen, nice round number heading for either Naples, Fl. or Naples, Italy.  The other twelve told me that it is a big surprise for me.. They told me to bring sunscreen, and the one pair of shorts I own. They also told me we will probably, visit Brighthouse Network Field, and there is a beautiful stretch of Gulf Beach right in front of us.. They said the flight is only about 21/2 hours, and that it isn't that far from places we have stayed before.. HA!! who do they think they are messin with, I knew all along we were going to Italy....Doesn't matter too me, it ain't where you go, it is who you are with that really counts..
OK, Philly calm down. This is what makes the post season so exciting.. What else could you ask for, a deciding game five, in the NLDS, and the Doctor in the house.. Let's get it on. I wish it was tonight, but doesn't really matter what I wish..It is Friday night, so be it, have too watch it even though Saturday is an early wake up. I don't know why we have to be the first PLAIN out of Philly whenever we go somewhere, but then again, this Simpleton has nothing to do with the planning, so just shut up and enjoy..
Bring whatever you feel like as usual.. and let's just fly with it.. Get it fly..Little known fact.  Flies are one of the most annoying fucking bugs ever created, and believe me I have seen some annoying fucking bugs, in the places my old ass has been stuck at one time or another.  There is just something disgusting about a fly. Number one a fly comes from a maggot, kind of disgusting on it's own. Number two they eat shit.  Then I heard one of those people that study bugs, I'm taking a shot here, Entomologist, say that when they land on your food they shit.. SHIT!! are you fuckin kiddin me, do you know how many flies land on your food in a life time..If they shit every time they land on our food, we must eat a mountain of fly shit by the time we die..Last night I had one of those bastards in the bunker, every time I was really gettin into the game or munching a pretzel, here he comes a buzzin all around me.. Start swinging a paper like a fucking lunatic, and jump outta the chair flinging my arms around like a chopper..I had to get him on one of those swings as I threw my shoulder out, and knocked the chair over.. Get everything straightened out, buzz buzz buzz..Son of a bitch you gotta be kidding me.. OK, he lands, take a swing like Babe Ruth only to see him fly onto the ceiling.  Some people might think this is funny.. This is not funny, I am sweating like one of those slaves in a Roman era movie working in the salt mines of Mesopotamia..I cannot kill this bastard, and it is frustrating the hell out of me..Next time he lands I miss again, hurt my ribs. He buzzes away only to land right on the TV screen. I do not care, if I smash the TV to smithereens. WHACK!!!!! DEAD!! Bottle of Windex and a roll of paper towels later, I got to watch the game, of course it was two innings later...

"Today Is The 5th Day Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2011."

"It Is Now Post Time."
We're Off.  That's gettin it done Phightin's.  A lot of people will be saying, shit man, it took a pinch hit home run to finally get too Garcia, they will forget about that in about, ohhhh 1 inning tonite..Ready for some profoundity, A win is a win is a win.. Look at the series and the Phils are up 2-1 and got home field advantage back..Take it and run..Time for the batsmen too arrive..
On too a hate game, only this is no game..I, by mistake, clicked into WIP this morning and heard that Cataldi Creeps voice. I can't even stand too listen to his New England nasal fucking twang.. HOW does he have a million dollar or more contract with a radio station in Philly.. Get rid of that New England fuck and his buddy, the ever insipid, hockey geinius Morganti.. Go, get the fuck out of town. You stink.. Who listens too this jerk off, and whh?? He is a braggard, a loud mouth and a big goof that probably never hit or caught a ball at any level, and the best he brags about how he calculates his tips, and stiffs people that serve him.. The next one, should get some balls and spit right in his fuckin face.. If I had a restaurant,  I wouldn't allow that cheap bastard in the door..On too the other jerk-off that used to be on in the afternoons. You know, that genius, Eskin, what a scum bag.. He evidently predicted and Eagles stone cold lock over the Niners Sunday, and said if the Eagles didn't win he would ride a bike across the U.S.  Get going.  I wanna see this punk ride a bike across the U.S. the first snake he sees, he will shit his spandex..Prediction...He will not do it, and if he try's he will not make it.. Unless he has cars toting him mile after mile.. He can't do it.. You heard it here first on Plain and Simple..
Where oh Where is Plain.  Man works for a day and rests for two.. What is going to happen to the Ville when the Merry Men head South next week.  We will get back and Jimmy Mc. will have the place wallpapered with animal pictures..
On too todays theme..What is your take on these assholes that announce the various shows around town, especially the radio shows.  As you can tell I really can't stand them.. I don't listen too any sports programs on the radio.. I used to, then I was like, what the fuck am I listening too..These assholes aren't even from Philly.  They didn't grow up in Philly, they know nothing about the CYO leagues the high school rivalries, the home grown pro athletes, the old time Philles, A's, Eagles, Warriors, Sixers. They have no idea about the neighborhood camaraderie and the way Philly people are loyal to their neighborhood first and the city second.. Why do they have these jobs..Get rid of them.. Let Philadelphia people broadcast Philadelphia shows.. Another thing, I don't know if it is just me, but I sure would like to hear Whitey and Harry doing these games.. I had too listen to Anderson and some other ghoul on the radio yesterday for about two innings.  I had no idea what the fuck they were talking about or what the fuck was going on in the game.. Don't get it.. Maybe I am just getting old and miserable.. I can take old, or I can take miserable, but old and miserable, that is like sick and tired... I am sick and tired being sick and tired.. LOL!! I gotta get on the road with my trusted Indian companion Phil The Thrill From Cherry Hill.. He could get a GPS system lost..

Today is Mercoledi, the 5th Day of October, 2011 A.D. Countdown to the departure of the Merry Marauders

HEY GOAT……You mean can we can this place for a whole week starting Saturday?  And bring our friends?  No way…….................Thanks goat………

Today is Martedi, October 4th, 2011 A.D.

Self Explainitory.............

"Today Is The 4th Day Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2011."

It Is Now Post Time.
We're Off,  Countdown to Naples is on 5 days until the space ship takes off with the remaining aliens..Not, illegals mind you, but real aliens.. I do believe that aliens did arrive centuries ago, but I don't believe it was, like in Eygpt or anywhere in that vicinity. I believe it was around or right in the heart of Manayunk.. I have been around this globe we call Earth once or twice, and have never met humanoids that act like the people or whatever we are, from the Yunk..I mean this in a good way, no one, and I mean no one has ever made me laugh, like my life long friends.  Some of the stunts they have pulled thoughout their lives is unbelievable, and I use unbelievable in it's true definition.. Nobody would believe it..Oh, and I must admit, I am way up on the list, but for some reason, when I pull one of my many maneuvers, that make them think, where is he from, they kinda expect it..So therefore, I don't get as many laughs as the rest of them, they think that is just the way I am..Once again they are right..
Well my Mexican crew should be arriving soon, work day at the Ville..Critters are racked out maybe I'll get Babe too wake them up.., that should be amusing..Only three today, Roberto Witez was already bitchin, about the poor working conditions, and low pay...He decided too stay in his hacienda for the day in protest, he will be back the next time..NO SOUP FOR YOU ROBERTO!!!
Sports Note: As we all know, the Phightin's start up again tonite..This guy pitchin for the Cardinals has been pretty rough on the Phils lineup..This guy pitchin for the Phils has been pretty rough on everybody.. Edge Phillies.. Big game, but then again this time of year they just keep getting bigger and bigger, that is what makes it so much fun.. I think Charlie Manuel, was trying to espouse that very thought, when he said, "just telling them too relax and have fun." Really man, this is still a game, and a game that these guys have played all their lives.. They are in the show for a reason, that reason is they are the best basball players in this world. So, go out and do what you do best.. Play baseball and enjoy it, after all it is still a kids game...OK everybody bring some alien stories,  us people from the Yunk should be good at this.. I know Plain believes he has been in the midst of Aliens, and that he has actually spoken and hung out with them.. He just doesn't realize that was during his blackouts in the 60's and 70's, he thought we were all Aliens. I think he might be right.....

"Today Is The 3rd Day Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2011."

"It Is Now Post Time..
We're Off....Looks like the citizens are off, nobody around all weekend. I wonder what that is about..Critters got the smoke signals and were jumping all over the Ville last nite.. They wanted to have a Screwdriver party this morning, but told them it would have too be near the end of the week..
I guess you already know what we have to talk about today..SPORTS!! mainly PHILLIES, and a little PIGILLES...
Let's try the PIGLLES first.  This team that idiots say, they bleed green for, (next time you hear somebody say that, tell them too cut themselves, I promise it will be red.) is not now, or ever going to win a super bowl, as long as, Pig, Beetlejuice, and Arnold Stang are in charge.. You have a coach, who can't even manage a clock. He can't change the game plan, and he can't win the big game.. He hasn't done it and he is not going to do it..How the fuck does anybody invest the money they did in a quarterback that plays the game like Vick.. He will not make it through the season.. Guys are hitting him and making him cry every play..Yet they let, what looks like a very promising quarterback in Kevin Cobb walk for another defensive back.. They have no linebackers. They have their long time offensive line coach, now coaching a very offensive, defense.. I'm done and so are they, stick the proverbial fork up their snouts....
THE PHILLIES!!!
I can see it now, the anxiety level in Philly is at an all time high.. OK, deep breath...The worst thing that happened last night is that the Phils lost.. The second worst thing that happened is Cliff Lee, spit up a four run lead.. The best thing that happened is, it was only the second game.. The series is tied, it isn't over.. I think Cole Hamels is a pretty good option for the next game.. I think he will come out and prove that the Phillies are the team to beat..Phils got into the Cardinals bullpen pretty deep last nite, just couldn't close the deal..Don't jump the train yet, still a lot of baseball to come our way..
Alright, on too Monday, as always you can have it.  I personally don't like it.. Seems like the tired, wants some sleep, the thirsty wants some Vodka and the hungry want some beans.., but you gotta work.. Something is wrong with that picture.. I propose a three day weekend.. 4 days of 10 hours work.. Saturday, Sunday and Monday off. That way we could change Monday to Funday, and stop all this needless tiredness and anxiety that people go through on Monday morning..Little known fact, the two day weekend was initiated by The Marquis De Sade, yep, right after he got done kickin somebody in the balls on a Friday, he said he was tired and wasn't going to whip anybody's ass until Monday.. He needed a couple of days to rest up for a good whuppin he was laying on some damsel from Paris..Anyhow, after the Marquis went to his quarters his servant came in and gave him some fine wine and a beautiful woman visitor from Cologne.  The Marquis spent, Friday night, Saturday and Sunday in a debauchery unknown to man kind, he did shit with this chick that only he could dream of, when they finally quit on Monday, the Marquis was so infatuated with Esmeralda, that he married her... He then declared that Saturday and Sundays would be days of rests, inbetween, ball kicking, whuppins, and debauchery... The Marquis then went on to relish every weekend,  as he put everything he had into fuckin people up all week, he knew he could take a break come VODKADAY.. That Marquis De Sade he was a real innovator....Next time you can't wait to have off on a Saturday, just thank that old Sadist..I say fuck him, he should have made it a three day weekend..
The countdown to The Trip Of The Year Is Now Officially On.. The boys of Summer, Fall, Winter, Spring, are flying south in 6 days..Last Class is the best Class.. Anybody that ever flew with me, knows what that means.. Bring anything you think about the baseball playoffs. I know there are visitors out there that have other teams they are watching, besides the Phightins. Also, any Piggles thoughts, let us see them.. Be Back Later....
t

Today is Lunedi, October 3rd, 2011 A.D.

Here is some of the entertainment at the Ville when Simple is gone.  The Goat E-Mailed me this on the QT.

"Today Is The 2nd Day Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2011."

"It Is Now Post Time."
We're Off.. We got no shot of winning this race as we got outta the gate late..Another weekend in the Yunk, hard to take care of the Ville from The Hill.., Had, to stop at The Thrill's house, and get on down the road tomorrow.. I tried too call the Ville, but none of the critters no how to operate a phone.., so me and Phil are trying too send smoke signals, but Cherry Hill isn't like the Ville or the Hill. The neighbors are pissed.. Hey man, calm down.  I gotta get in touch with my critters. Put out the fire.  I will put out the fire in your fuckin eye, as Phil drags me away from his neighbor with me kicking a burning log at the guy.. Fuckin people don't understand loyatlty.. Have too stay loyal to the people that are loyal too you.. It is one great quality to have, and I guess if you think about it, a lot of people don't have it.. Shame on them.. I know a lot of things in this life, and I have been around this globe once or twice, and I know a lot of people in my home town of Manayunk have loyalty...I am going to do an ode to Manayunk one day this week.  Manayunk and the many great people that live there and have died there deserve to be immortalized here at the Ville, and I am going to make sure that happens... Hey Plain, where the fuck were you yesterday????  Simple was acting as only Simple can act.  I just wonder if I am ever going to mature.. I guess it is too late.. Fuck it...