"Today Is The 21st Day Of September InThe Year Of Our Lord 2012."

It Is Now Post Time.
We're Off..Emu's and flightless birds...ARK!!  BIRDS THAT CAN'T FLY AIN'T BIRDS!! BIRDS THAT CAN'T FLY AIN'T BIRDS!!!!You just called them birds you flyin bag of shit..ARK!! WHERE IS MY MAIN MAN PLAIN!! WHERE IS MY MAIN MAN PLAIN?????!!!! You want Plain Greeny, hold right there...running into the bunker, grab the shotgun....I got your Plain right here Blabber Beak!!!! Breathe, Relax, Aim, Slack, Squeeze...CLICK!! What the fuck it's empty...ARK!! GOT IN THE BUNKER AND EMPTIED IT!! GOT IN THE BUNKER AND EMPTIED IT!!! Be right back Greeny, fallin over Meere who was really fucked up last nite...Meere, Meere,!!! Where did that parrot hide my shotgun shells....HE PUT THEM IN BILLY'S BAG...son of a bitch....be right there Greeny, walkin out with an axe. ARK!! BETTER PUT THAT DOWN ASSHOLE I AM JUST FLYING AWAY!! BETTER PUT THAT DOWN ASSHOLE I AM JUST FLYING AWAY!!!! Head in my hands, can't take it man, can't take much more..
HEY EVERYBODY, take a look at the front page of the PHILADELPHIA DAILY NEWS..HEADLINES,,,THE LAST PINEY!!!!!!..Old Bill Waslowich..I don't disagree with the Princeton educated writer that wrote about him as a Piney, but I do disagree as the last Piney..He should have delved deeper into those woods, rather than stopping his quest at The Twisted Barrel Gun Club...about 10 miles from the bunker...but that place makes the bunker look like a city.. Old Bill lives at the club and has for decades..they took his pick-up and his license off of him because he refused to get insurance and registration...those two things don't exist where he lives...At one time back in the seventies, they were going to eke out the world's larges airport smack dab in the middle of The Barrens..that would have been a catastrophic mistake...As under this 1.1 million acre oasis is enough fresh water to supply all of New Jersey, Philadelphia, and New York into and beyond the next millennium...Am I a preservationist, I guess in a way, there are certain natural and unnatural things that man should leave alone...and Old Bill, The Pine Barrens, Chatsworth, The Cranberry Farms, The Blueberry Farms, The Rivers, that run through the pines..The Piney Shacks, and last but now least my man Spike...I met Spike back in the seventies, and he worked landscaping with me..You have to picture ZZ Top Beard, Overhauls, Crusty Hat, Hair Down To His Ass, Work Boots. and an accent that would remind you of rural West Virginia...Spike and Me would throw back more than a few and I would tell him about the city and he would tell me about the Pines...When he grew confident with me, he took me to his abode...Let's just say.  Still, for some whiskey. Saw Mill,.,, Shack,, animals and a hospitality to suit royalty..He couldn't do enough to make me comfortable. I just enjoyed him as a human being...He had a saw mill in the pines where you could never find it, and here he would go into the cedar swamps and cut cedar for fencing...you cannot find a better wood for fencing, but you can't get it...we could, and the next move was, me and Spike were doing cedar fencing, until one day an officer of the State Of New Jermany asked us where we were getting the cedar...I stepped in front of Spike and told him we have it imported from Cedar Swamps in Georgia...He asked if we would measure his yard and give him a price...Sure thing officer...Spike loved that and was laughing his balls off at me as usual...He let me run the saw sometimes and holy moly did that thing cut some wood..We made many a trip to the Pic-A-Lily, and he loved baseball..I drifted off into the other business, and I didn't get to see Spike much...,every now and then at the Pic,we would run into each other and reminisce about our out riding fences days....I don't know what happened to my man..but I do know that if he is still around Old  Bill is not the last Piney..Hey Spike wherever you be. thanks for those nights on the back porch with a cold brew watching the sunset and thinking we were forever young.....