Mornin, Great conversation last night with a soon to be really old friend of mine, one Davey Morris.. We are chatting up the Preakness, and the Phils and whatever.., I tell him dude, I gotta make a WaWa run get some watermelon. He hears this and says, yo did you hear about the watermelons in China? I'm like no I didn't hear anything about any watermelons in China, thinkin to myself where is this gone, he says, they are getting so big they are exploding.. Yeah OK, he says, no, they are their so big their exploding.. I said, well why?? What's making them explode? He says, they don't know but I do...Here it comes.. Go ahead why are watermelons blowin up in China? Because of the Tsunami that happened in Japan and the fallout..I hate to admit this, but he may have a point there. Don't ever let him know I said that..Imagine that, watermelons blowin up from nuclear waste, what's next walnuts flying.. Sammy would love that..You gotta be shittin me, with all the people that are still hungry in China, their watermelons are exploding.. Alright, all Chinamen, now hear this, now hear this, get your asses, and masses into the nearest melon field, and wait for the melons to start poppin. Then dive the fuck in boys, every man for himself.. It will be like a watermelon eatathon.. They could call it watermelon Bowl. First Chinaman to blow up is the winner.. What the fuck if your eating the stuff that nuclear waste is blowing up, what do you think is going to happen to you?? We should start selling them to the Cowards!!! I don't know why stories like this amuse me, I guess because I have a sick sense of humor. The two Slavs just made themselves laugh so hard they puked..This language is fucked up..OK on this rainy hump day, only hump day until we come up with a name here at the ville..Let's do the Calendar. Anybody, anything, movies names with days, months, years you know as titles or whatever.. I'll do a few then try and get some work done, here on a dismal day in the Pines...
Doris Day
Ruby Tuesday
Monday Monday
April Love
May West
June Billingsley
Princess Summer Fall Winter Spring
Dakota Fleming (just threw that in there to fuck you up)
25 comments:
Shakes my head at you Simple where do you live in a Pumpkin Patch. The mellons exploded because they put a chemical growth accelerator on them and you can't do it during a wet period and they did it too late in the season!!!!
But have you seen the mellons on J Lo ? ut oh whites that out.Thats why I hate to correct mistakes then I can't see the screen.
Doris Day
Ruby Tuesday
Monday Monday
April Love
Mae West
June Billensgley
Princess Sumer Fall Winter Spring
J LO
Okay Okay let me be serious:
1 Ida Tishrei
2 Bavel Cheshvan
3 Abe Kislev
4 Shmos Teves
5 Aharon Shvat
6 Morris Adar
Plain, didn't you see I used May West? What is wrong with you dude?
Chemical accelerators!!! What the fuck is that?????? I guess when you can't hit your balls, you gotta break mine..What the hell does JLO have to do with the Calendar??? Don't make me come over there!!(until Saturday)..
The Fallen (yeah, yeah I know your niece was in the movie, she also, happens to be my cousin, only in the Yunk kids only in the Yunk)
Summer Wind came blowin in from across the sea.....it lingered there and touched your hair as you walked with me..da da all Summer long we sang that song as we walked that golden sand,,,,,,,,two sweethearts anddddddddd The Summer Wind..daddaaddaa...
Hey Plain, we must have been walkin through the Ville at the same time, your lucky I didn't see ya...Quit messin up the topic, stick with.
Moishe Dyan
Bette Midler
Henry Thornton
Bugsy McFarland
Lefty Grove
Quit messin around Plain, I mean it this time.......!!!!!!!!!!!
Why did you use Mae West? Why are you copying from me?Thats so not fair! Points at you and yells your cheating.Thats a pretty good trick Simple you must be copying fast....nods and walks away
I know Bugsy McFarland who the hell is Lefty Grove and that Mushie Dianne ?
Plain, you know Bugsy McFarland? Little known fact. He is the leader of the McFarland clan of The Farlands of Ireland.. Years ago the other clans ganged up on the McFarlands, and made them move to the highest and most unreachable parts of the Emerald Isle.. Thus the word Farlands, was incorporated into this fucked up language.. THE MCFARLANDS!!
What there the McFarlands from Malin Head up near Lough Foyle ? Points way up there^Well don't that beat all the things ya learn in Simpleville!!!!
Yeah Malin Head and them farland reaching places..They only came down from the FARLANDS to plunder the nearest PUB. Which was in County McPechin and there was one in ShursTown.. Mcmillerecks were the poor tavern owners that had to suffer at the hands of THE MCFARLANDS. I think I will print today's Posts and Quotes for Saturday, they should make for some interesting reading...
You must be in Golf withdrawal. Just a couple more days and it will be alright.
I Love, I Love, I Love my calendar Girl.
May Day May Day
4th of July
Groundhog Day for Sammy
Bird Watching Day, June 31st, for the Green one
Ides of March
Autumn Leaves
Dog Days of August/Summer
September (Earth Wind and Fire)
April Love....Pat Boone....Bad Pick Simple. Organ Annie made me sing that some over and over then the nuns. Bad choice, yep bad memories standing in front of the class and crooning that tune. Shoud apply for disability.
You might think I'm crazy, but I am.. I remember little Jimmy McCool standing in front of the class singin. Now, I can't say I remember April Love, but I remember something. If I am not mistaken, Harry Rafter, or Harry Morris, was it another Morris?? He used to get up and sing.. I did a few renditions of Ernie Claus Well actually I still do that..
Roll out those lazy hazy DAYS of Summer.
Winter Wonderland..
DAYtona five hundred
WEEKend at Ernie's
Month to Month resusitation
Trisha YEARwood..
June Allyson
Sunset Carson
Dennis Day
Sunday Urban
Yesssssssssssssssssssss I got Sunday Urban does a back flip then starts to Charleston on one leg as i kick the other one out woooooooooo hooooooooooo Stick to the task at hand Simple quit jumping around to stupid subjects, stick with the topic wil ya!
Are you calling the logistical, calibration of the MeFARLANDS a stupid subject?? I thought everyone would be interested in knowing that little known fact..Cheesh what a grouch!!
Day dream believer and a home comin Quuueeennnnnn!!
Sunrise Sunset Sunrise Sunset swiftly go the years.
At The Hop
How you like it Plain??
I think Mchugh shot himself in the ass...
WHERE THE FUCK IS THE GENERAL????
Looks around McHugh is the one that shot Bin Laden, Eric Holder is now holding him on Murder Charges, I think there pissed cause he wanted the 25 Million. There Holding him in Gitmo and are in the process of water Boarding him but Pat ain't Talkin.
Gitmo ah!! Gitmo what fond memories of a long time ago in a land far away.. Even when I pulled guard there, had no idea why we were in Cuba..I thought it was the land of Castro and Che'. Crazy what you learn as you get older.. The Navy and the Marines are still there..I remember it being like it's own town..Sorta like the Ville. Ships pulled in we went to the guard barracks and up into the mountains. There was fencing and the Cubans were on the other side. We weren't supposed to communicate, so every now and again I would look to see if one of them was aiming at my Simple Ass. Seems like a century ago...
Love the yarn about the McFARlands.
Let's see what we can do with today's quiz - you already used some of what I had in mind, but here goes........................
1. Never on Sunday
2. Blue Monday
3. Tuesday Weld
4. Wednesday - today
5. Maundy Thursday
6. Good Friday
7. Saturday in the park, I think it was the 4th of July (yeah I know J. Mc already used the 4th of July)
8. January Jones
9. February - the shortest longest month of winter
10. Time Marches on
11.& 12. April Showers bring on May Flowers
13. June Moon
14. Guns of August
15. September Morn'
16. Hourglass
17. Minute to Minute
18. Day to Day
19. Second time around
20. Years gone by
21. Clint EASTwood
22. North by Northwest
23. Southern Nights
24. Go West Young Man
You're right Simple, this is one
f_ _ _ _ d -up language.
My word is coula - Simple, ask Sammy but I think that's some kind of marsupial that lives in Australia.
Sammy says, It is a little known fact that Coula was from the Coula, Fran, and Ollie clan of Western Australia, yes some Darwinist believe that Coula is a marsupial, other literateri claim that Coula was nothing more than a puppet. This argument has been going on now since the 1950's When Coula, Fran and Ollie got their own TV show..Coula was like Sammy as it could talk.. I will ask Sammy to try and figure out what a Coula really is.. I know what a Fran and Ollie are..Blat and Slat have been passed out ever since I told them to take a break, and they broke each others legs..this language is fucked up..
Actually the Coula is where you were put when you fucked with Col. Klink or Sgt. Shultz haaaaaaaaaaaaaoh chit whooooo whooooo okay okay for real now The Coula is the one ahead of Pepsi Coke a Couals haaaaaaaaaaaaaa oh God stop me somebody call 911okay okay lets try this again . The Coula is one of three Trees in the Olacaceae family found in Tropical Africa it is also know as the African Walnut.........stop stop as you were stay seated , it's why i'm here.............oh go on with ya sit down.......i'm going to blush
You People are Hilarious, all of you.I dont comment much but I read this everyday.I think both Plain and Simple aren't as dumb as they act.And are both professionals in there Field.I belive college Graduates.
College boys can be educated idiots. You do need a degree in life to live in Plain and Simple Ville.......but acting dumb? Simple plays the Field and Plain teaches on the Field, in the playoffs, so I guess yes they are experts in their fields. Nice to see someone sign their name to a comment and thanks for watching this comedic Blog. Remember there are no rules and it helps break the troubles that this world is in right now. Perhaps, Plain and Simple have stumbled on the secret of life. H U M O R...Keep reading it can only get better.....Chime in with your field Catey.
Hi Catey, whoever you may be, it is nice to see your comment and kind words.., but I am afraid, that myself and Plain aren't playing. We are dumb..lol!! Welcome to the Ville. By the way, the McFarlands are great friends of ours and I bust on them all the time about being from the FARLANDS!!
I don't know nor do I care, how I got on the McFarlands..but we were supposed to be doing anything with a calendar.
Soooooooo
The Day The Earth Stood Still..
That reminds me, some moron has come up with Saturday for the end of the world..Where do they hatch.. Pulllezzze.............
The world isn't ending Saturday..The Preakness is Saturday.. I would like to take this so called prophet or whatever he is and see if he could pick me a superfecta,at the track.. Yeah, I am making fun of it, so be it...Look if it ends there ain't a damn thing I can do about it, so who gives a shit.. Look at it this way.. We all die, but we all go out together..
HOORAH!!!
Hey if he is allowed to make predictions so am I..
The World Won't End Saturday.
Let's see who is right, the prophet or the Simpleton.
Hey sounds like a good movie. Or a Blog site Prophet and Simple. Nah doesn't have a good ring to it.. Slat stop with the bell chiming my man...PHEW!!
Welcome back Catey. You are on the right trail. This is just for fun and we are glad you are enjoying it. Stop by more often and like J. Mc said chime in with your field. I never go on here without laughing and laughter is the best medicine in the world.
Dark rainy night here at the Ville. Doing a little channel surfing, Phillies, broke the losing streak, but looks like they are going to be living on the edge all year..
Idol, just to watch Plain watch JLo.
Bulls and Heat good B'Ball game.
When lo and behold I run into the original Wolfman. No, not here at the Ville, wait let me look again, those two Slavs are enough to scare any old Wolfman away..the one with Lon Chaney. I think the Wolfman was actually better lookin than Lon Chaney. They should have been reversed. Lon Chaney could scare the shit out of somebody. The old Wolfman he was constantly getting picked on. Family, Detectives, Villagers, Dogs. Everybody wanted a piece of his hairy ass.. That might be the best werewolf movie of all time.. Well there is howling gone on here in the Ville but it those two Slavs with their broken legs. Sammy and Greeny are runnin around taunting them.. ARK ARK!! Can't catch me, can't catch me.. Fookin Purroot ass sun ass ma lag heeels. M goona kelt you. YO!! everybody knock it off, rack time. The day is done, and so is the fun..We will light up again tomorrow. Come on guys lights out.. Stay Out Of Harms Way My Friends.. TAPS....
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