Mornin, Here comes Summer, anybody watch the news last night, The Atlantic City Expressway was happening. Why, I must ask, do the Sheople have too leave all at once? I know they have too get that last ride in (I did it), I know they have too say they were the last one in the ocean, I know they want the boardwalk to empty out with them, but besides that why do they stay till the bitter end? They know they are heading for traffic armeggedon. I guess I can answer my own question, they don't want it to end. We programmed this generation, just like we were programmed. They know come Tuesday the bell rings and they better answer it, but so what, they ain't leaving the jam session, another band is coming on at nine, they have a designated driver (or not), they met a new girl.. Fuck Tuesday, I'll deal with that tomorrow. I wonder what the stats are on people calling out of work the day after one of the big summer weekends? Probably pretty high. Hate too see the good times end, I can relate to that..So, there they sat on The A. C. Expressway until 2AM or worse yet, runnin up the A. C. Expressway at 6 O'clock this morning trying too make work.. AHH!! The beginning of Summer, A.C. (After Childhood)
Blat, Splat, mornin, sit down, good boys, here is a bagel with some butter. See bagel butter you got it? Yef, ve hav et.. Emm goot.. You like that good, you know you live in the Ville, in The Pine Barrens and we have to be careful, some of the critters can get dangerous. There are snakes out here and devils, and todays subject BEARS!! NO!! NO!! why are you ripping your fucking clothes off, OH MAN! I don't want to see that VeinerSnitzel, AH MAN!! don't turn around, those Slavs have some hairy asses.. I can't stand it, no don't jump up again, YOUF SET STAND!!! I'm going back to the bunker.
Hey guys, today think about one of those times, when it was time to go, but nooooooo you didn't go, and you paid the price..I will be back, I have many..
14 comments:
I know this doesn't have anything to do with me stretching a party out till no one was there but me, I usually drove them all away. I said that before Plain. How about Oprah please go the fuck away. I know she is the most beloved of all humans ever born. I know she is the greatest human being ever born. I know she is a miracle worker and a great philanthropist. I know she saved the Western World, what nine ten times. WILL SOMEONE PLEASE MAKE HER GO AWAY!!! She shut her show down, I never, never watched it, she is as annoying as it gets.. PLEASE TAKE YOUR AWESOME TALENT (WHAT TALENT?) AND GO!! ONCE AND FOR ALL, YOU HAVE STAYED WAY TOO LONG!! There more on her later..
One more thing about her Divine Presence, Her Almighty Humanity (Oprah). When she was trying to lose weight, she went to a psychiatrist for help..You know he was top notch. Nothing but the best for Her Emminence. Everybody else has to do it alone, and on their own, I don't think they can afford psychiatric help for a weight problem. Anyhow on her first visit, he tells her to strip naked and get down on all fours. She thought this a weird request but she obliged. Then he told her to crawl to the wall in front of him. She did this, then he said crawl over to the wall on the right..She did he looked at her and said, ok crawl over to the wall on the left. She finally said, Doctor is this going to help me lose weight, he said, hell no, I am getting a black couch delivered tomorrow and I wanted to see which wall it would look best. She left that party quickly.
Did you hear about the time Lady O got stopped at the airport for having 40 lbs. of crack in her ass?
Lmao!!!!!!
Hey Strebor, when they found the 40lbs. of crack in her ass, did they lock her up ala Lohan, or Hilton? That is a lot of crack.. She had it in her ass? She could have put 400 lbs. in that ass.. OHHHH!! I get it, little slow today, her ass crack weighed 40 lbs. aha haa haa ha ha !! oh, stop, ha ha aah ahh ahh ahh ahh. There we go calm, down Simple it wasn't that funny. ahh!!! Blat Slat!! did you hear that one?? Laugh it UP a little will ya!!! Where you goin?? They climbed to the top of a tree and are laughing their balls off. That's not what I meant by laughing it UP!!! Man, what am I going to do??
Tell them to laugh their balls ON and keep laughing it DOWN!
UH-OH, I heard some yelping outside the ville. Sounded like Plain or a scalded dog.. I hope Plain's balls didn't get fried.. That would be awful, I don't want any dogs getting scalded, but I would rather see that than my man's fried balls. It had to be hot on the links today..
Yep like you I have too many to mention. Always paid the price but it only because it was too much fun not to go, at the time. Again, thank you Guardian Angel.....
It had to be hot for Plain and the merry band of hackers. But at least no rain on their parade.
The wife of a good friend of mine got tickets for Oprah and she made him fly out to Chicago with her. I was pumping him up that it could be the show where she would give them each a car. The guest was a female OBGYN and they talked for an hour about feminine hygiene. Very few men.......
That sounds like a great show, there Jimmy Mc, hope your friend enjoyed himself. GAG!! She could have told me she was given me a car and I wouldn't go too her show.. Well let's not get carried away here. Blat put Slat down and stop carrying him into the woods. Damn Man.. This language is fucked up..
OPRAH Friggin OPRAH I know how she can lose 50 pounds of ugly fat and keep it off.........Cut off her Friggin Head !!!!
Did ya hear Oprah was flying on Air Force One with Obuma and his Wife she says I could throw out a 1000 bill aqnds make someone very happy, So Michelle says well I could throw out 10 one Hundred Bills and make 10 people happy! So Obuma says,well I could throw out 100 Ten Dollar bills and make 100 people happy Oprah and Michelle smiled and said see thats why your the President your so smart................The Pilot looked at the co Pilot and smirked and said I could throw them all out and make 300 million People happy! haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa slaps my kneesssssss afriggin knee slapper heeeee heeeeeeee haaaaaa chit call 911 I'm killing myself .
You might be laughin Plain, but that is probably the truth. I don't know how we got on Oprah, but it is fun. She is really annoying. I just want her to go away.. There were people in the audience that were crying at the last show, and people in the streets, wailing in sorrow. The next time they can't pay their mortgage, I want them to call and ask Oprah for help. Maybe St. Oprah will pay it for them. Yeah right again Simple!!
Lets see here a time you should of left and didnt then paid the Price hmmmmmmmmmmm many of them one that Comes to mind is when I was on the rock better known as Okinawa met a friend and we got a lil tippsy and I tried to get on a plane with him and His Commanding Officer had no sence of humor and Called the MP's to take me away. For a Simple thing like that and yes it was none other that Simple His self one L/Cpl Keebler.
Knock it off Plain, gotta say that is one time I was glad you were not with me.. Although it made me feel good, knowin you didn't want me to go, without ya..Just all those officers and MP'S got pissed. I really can't imagine why!! That was a long time ago, in a Land far away. Plain you are the Man..
The Slavs have a TV hooked up, they are watching the NBA Finals with the critters, and chanting NOVITSKI!!NOVITSKI!! like they know who Novitski is. Sammy and Greeny are GRRRRIN and ARKIN!! they don't even know nor care what basketball is, just another excuse to drink. Sammy and myself heard voices out here in the Ville last night, Sammy thinks it is that Old Jersey Devil.. Told Sammy if he comes around, sic him on the Slavs. They will kick that old devils ass. As for this old devil, I gotta get rid of the voices, tell them critters to turn the TV down, and lock up the Ville. For some reason, Oprah got her just dessert from Plain and Simpleville, and I don't even know why.., hey, no rules. So she got besmirched (how ya like that word for the end) Hey see ya tomorrow. Lot's of hits, not a lot of comments, once again that is ok.. Stay Out Of Harms Way My Friends..TAPS....
Turn out the lightsssssssssssssssss the Partyssssssssssssssss overrrrrrrrrrr.............walks down the street of the ville singinggggggggggggg in the rainnnnn starts Tapping in the puddles............wonderds did gene kelly do Grace Kelly smirks and hoofs down the street. Poof
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