"It Is Now Post Time. Guy blows the bugle the horses are now entering the track...Oh wait a minute brain freeze.
We're Off..Yes siree McFinn you are a wanted man.. HA!! those critters were screaming at 5 O'clock this morning. SAMPLE. SAMPLE!!! NO PRASANTS!! SANTA DADN'T COOM!!! He may have came, but it was with Mrs. Claus you Neandrathals.. Hey McFinn, told me it was Christmas Eve.ARK!!!!!!! PHONY BULLSHIT, PHONY BULLSHIT ARK!!!! ARK!! WHERE IS MCFINN, WHERE IS MCFINN ARK!!!! hahahhah, Let McFinn take some of their nastiness, see how he likes it.. Whistling sound over the bunker, hahahah Sam The Squirrel Man just went flying by with his little squirrel hands balled up in little squirrel fists..ahahahhhaa.. WHOA!!! Hattonna Matada Simple. UH, Hattoona Matadda Mere. When did you get as tall as me? We are not just MereKats Simple our toes keep growing so as we get older and when we stand on our toes we are naturally taller..Actually Mere, that is a good thing as your eyeballs our now sticking to the little bit of hair I have left.. Wait a minute Simple here comes Billy.. Hattonna Matada Billy AAAHHHHHHH!! Did you get any gifts last night? NAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!! OK Simple what is going on, if Christmas Eve was last night how come this Santa Dude didn't drop off Vodka and hay and some cashews and seeds and a leg of lamb and some acorns? What is up with that Simple?? Listen Mere go talk too the critters, McFinn said it was Chritmas Eve..MCFINN, HE NEVER KNOWS WHAT DAY IT IS.. Well there is your answer Mere...Is he coming here today? Chances are he will Mere. Well when he gets here let us know. OK Mere.. shutting the bunker door laughing my balls off. Fuckin McFinn is in trouble, oh man finally poetic justice, somebody else has to put up with this shit...Hi Jimmy you better start watching your calendar,, choke, choke, laughing while drinking coffee is not a good idea..
OK, on too more important issues..Scumdusky trial today. Give me and the general populace a little break, put the scum dusky pervert in jail and have his trial after Christmas..This will be headline news every fucking day.. I don't feel like hearing the lurid tales of this stone cold scab at Chritmas time..They waited this long wait another month..Hate the Judicial System, that along with most other systems in this countries political grinder need a thorough revamping... ECONOMIC SYSTEM, Treasury Dept, (taxes). Judicial System, Supreme Court, Congress, Presidency, Motor Vehicles, You name it, it needs improvement..Sooooo lets create jobs here at Plain and Simple..Hire the people that have new and innovative ideas on how to start to solve these problems.. You know, like lets fix the superstructure of this country. Let's get money into the hands of the people (they will spend it), let's hear one of these candidates say something that already hasn't been said.. As a drunken goat would say NAAAHHHHH!!!!!!
Today being another day closer to Chritmas, I would like to do an A-Z on Chritmas songs. If you don't want to do it. Don't do it.. No rules, just the Christmas one...We will not relinquish that, because that is not a unilateral decision. I think everyone agrees with me.....CHRISTMAS SONGS A-Z With a little definition to hopefully amuse you.. I amuse you, what am I some kinda clown??
A-Adeste Fidelis--Myself and a few of my friends can sing this in two languages.
B-Blue Christmas--Elvis is in the Ville..
C-Christmas in Kilarney, Strebor and her class singing this at the St. Johns annual Christmas Play.
D-Deck Your Balls With Poison Ivy, you will be singing FAALALLLALALAALAL
E-Ernie Claus
F-Frosty The Snowman. Amazing how we thought a snow man came to life one day..
G-God Rest Ye Merry Gentleman.
H-Holy Night (My all time favorite) Nat King Cole (one of the all time greatest.)
I-I'll be home for Christmas.
J-Jingle Bell Rock
K-
L-Little Town Of Bethlehem
M-Merry Christmas Baby
N.Noel
O-
P.
Q.
R. Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer. and it's sister song.. Randolph The Brown Nosed Reindeer, he was right behind Rudolph when the sleigh came to a screeching halt..
S.Silent Night
T.Tannenbaum.
U.
V.
W.White Christmas-- Little known fact, Der Bingle, tag name for Bing the child beater Crosby. Sang this all time favorite immediately after drinking a bottle of scotch, and dropping his nine year old kid on the front lawn, right next to where he ripped all of the reindeer's antlers off..A violent drunk is disgusting enough, but one that takes his violence out on an innocent is truly a mess..
X.You know there is no XM, around here..
Y.Yuletide Glitz by Santa and the Snowmen, little known fact, this group hit the Christmas scene around 1958, Yuletide Glitz was their only hit, yep they were one hit wonders..I remember the harmony to Yuletide Glitz and the perfect way they pronounced Macy's, because that is hard to do when you are as fucked up as this group, yep they were always drinking it up and harmonizing on the corner.. I am going to try and find out what happened to Santa and the Snowmen.. I never understood why they were called snowmen as they were all black..
Z.
Go for it, work calls.
12 comments:
Sure sure Simple take all the easy ones! I'll do the dirty work and do the Hard ones.
K Mele Kalikimaka
O O Tannenbaum
P Please come home for Christmas
Q Quiet Christmas
U Up on the House Tops
V Very Merry Christmas
Z Zingle Bells
P.S. And my Favorite : Riding in a One Whore sleigh
Good job as usual Plain (gag). I guess you and those other whackers, are afraid of a little cold air. Your lucky I ain't a toad. I'd have your asses out there sledge hammering fuckin 8 penny nails into the ground to whack off.. In fact I would do anything to whack off.
Phil The Thrill just said. What about that Tora Lora Lora..?? I said Phil that's an Irish lullaby..Yeah, but it was used to put the Irish kids too sleep on Christmas Eve. Are you sure about that? If I'm sure, then I ain't sure..HUH?? You can't hear E..HUH?? I SAID YOU CAN'T HEAR E!! I fuckin heard you. I just don't understand your philosophies sometimes..(all the time,) If you can't understand them, you can't.. OK Phil, you got anything you gotta do?? If I didn't have anything to do, I would have nothing to do.. PHEW!!!! My T is Tora Lora Lora.. He wins man, I can't compete with this guy.. I asked him to sign in as a citizen.. He said, what are you fuckin nuts?? I was born here....
EVERY MONTH
EVERY YEAR ALL THE TIME
SUNDAY SADDAY TWOSDAY WISHDAY
THIRSTDAY VODKADAY SICKDAY
1 3 5 6 11
12 9 10 7 18 15
16 19 17 14 2 4
20 24 6 22 29 26
8 23 21 25 27 30
32 34 36 38 39 33
35 37
OK...... Here my calendar that was given to me for a gift and this is what I go by. I still don't understand why it doesn't match the one in the kitchen..... but it works for me.
Songs of the HOLIDAYS or is it CHRISTMAS????????
Just PLAIN Jingle Bells
Let it Snow, Let it Snow, Let it Snow
Simple's Nuts Roasting on an open Fire
PLAIN Whack your balls with Bells and Holly, Tra la la la la la la la la
Oh Holiday Tree, Oh Holiday Tree
Sammy the Red Nosed Rodent
All I Want for Christmas is my toes back by SLav and Blat
I Saw Billy Eating the Christmas Tree
Up on the Roof Top MERE Will Pause
That should be enough for now.....
Later WHOE< WHOE< WHOE
Can't compete with you elves and critters.
Away In A Manger
Christmas Time in the City
The First Noel
Having a Wonderful Christmas Time
Home For The Holidays
I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus
It Came Upon a Midnight Clear
Jingle Bell Rock
O'Little Town of Bethlehem
Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree
Santa Baby
Santa Claus is Coming to Town
Silver Bells
Sleigh Ride
Suzy Snowflake
Winter Wonderland
Later, got work to do!
McFinn, you are getting in deeper and deeper shit.. Now, you are using Holidays instead of Christmas. I know why you are doing this, it is too fry Simple's nuts on an open fire. Keep it up McFinn, I won't only sic the critters on your ass, Plain will come a callin.....with Phil The Thrill..
E or Simplejust shoed me how to work the Plain and simpel chart. He talks about me. Does anybody read what he does. Do you people see the stuff he puts on here then he says something about me. He can't hear and he told me terry is PLain. I had to laugh at thatr I love terry i caint beleive he is the other half of this place i read some of the passages and they make aboslutly no sense i am goiong to join up as a citizen eRnie told me it is 120 dollars a year doesnt sound to bad because if it did it would sound bad
You gotta be shittin me he is signing up for citizenry, that will be it, visitors will be running the fuck out of here in droves..See Plain I knew in the beginning we should have stayed alone..Look at what we have now created, just to prove my point, please read McFinn's last comment. Look at the calendar the man uses..Stebor just jumps on and runs. Telling you Plain this place is a mess....
Just rember this Simple"He who Farts in Church , sits In Pew"
And here's a few of the Christmas songs me and some Brothers wrote.
1 The First Motel
2 o Homey Night
3 Red Black and green Christmas
4 Jingle bell Cock
5 Frosty the Mailman
6 I'm dreaming of a White Bitch
7 I'll be in Homesburg for Christmas
Phil just called and told me he can't sign in. I said why? He said cause I can't..Well is there a reason? Yeah I can't. That's it I have had it. I am knock knock knockin on Heavens doooor.
Hey if anybody comes in later blow TAPS.
"Stay Out Of Harms Way My Friends."
dennnnnn taaaaaaaa dennnn dentaaaaaaaaa dennnnnnnnnnnnnnnn
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