"It Is Now Post Time."
We're Off. Hey Plain, every now and then, every now then. I may run into a little puter problem where I can't make a post, or the puters may be sick or virused or something of that nature..So, don't break my balls Plain, when you in all your Jedi, Dancin, and Prancin, and Smirkyness, come into the Ville maybe once a month and have to make a post, then want your pay doubled..You will have to see McPay about that as he has taken over financing and just about everything else..I am bad with financing...as we well know...Anyway I see where you alluded to her majesty's celebrating her diamond jubilee, don't worry Plain, I have seen it, and I know you wanted to get my engines revved, but they were already rollin baby....I was trying to get into the Ville yesterday, when I got thrown onto some sale site, and lo and behold what do you think was for sale...DRUM ROLL EASY.....................................................the queens knickers,, you read that right THE QUEEN'S KNICKERS!!!! Now you must understand, she does not have to change her KNICKERS as much as the common women because she hasn't shit in 50 of her 60 years on the throne..Little known fact...the queen did excuse herself from a benefit for Little Lord Fauntleroy, about 45 years ago, as she felt very gassy after having a dinner of mutton and cauliflower, this is one of her favorite dishes, this according to her butler Jeeves...Well, everyone wondered where the queen went as she was not known to ever leave a table before the desert tarts were devoured by the upper class of idiots she dined with...One of the servers a little Plain looking guy snuck into the queens shit house as she was in the royal stall ripping off her knickers and farting a tune heard all across England, the Plain little server, gagged, but grabbed the knickers and ran...These are supposedly the knickers that are for sale, the asking price is a cool 4000.00.. Once again they are clean, as the queen has not shit nor stained in over 50 years...You heard it here first at Plain and Simple.. Phew who reads this shit...Anyway, for all you non believers, this is a true story...Really who reads this shit...Call me Plain...gotta talk....
7 comments:
I rember that story about the Plain server that took those Knickers Simple, but you forgot to tell about how he almost died when he stole the knickers!Yep it's a lil known fact that when he took them he ran out of the place where the Royal Flushes take Place.Nods yep he was running so fast and looking back he fell into the Ditch and the knickers got all muddy dirty and chit all over them.Next thing ya know Plains in the emergency room with multiple fractures severe bruises and needed about 100 stiches. When he came to the Doctor said what happened to you? Well this Plain guy says Doc I had the Queens Knickers and they were all muddy and dirty and chit all over them , so I ran into the Dry cleaners and I didn't notice these 6 huge Black guy's there and I yelled to the clerk Can't you do something about these dirty stinking knickers?
OMG!!!
Like I said, many many times. Who reads this shit??
We here at the Royal Academy Of The Guardians Of The Queen read it, and we are totally and regally embarrassed for the like of you common people..Speaking of our Queen as if she were a common dame. You Colonials have no idea how important The Royal Family and The Queen are to the people that love and respect The Crown..We would like you to please take a moment in your rebellious lives, and think about the good these Royals have bestowed upon us subjects throughout the centuries that they have ruled over us. That is right, look at the way they have treated their loyal and devoted subjects, then please in your next rantings and ravings about Her Majesty's Knickers show a little class as that is all you Colonials have is a little class...
Us Colonials have classy asses!
Hey whoever that royal guard or royal ass sniffer is, your telling me these royals did good for you!!!What do they do brain wash you before you are allowed on the guard?? I can't even get into how much they have fucked over the peasantry since the formation of the country known as England..I never read one of your history books, but I have read the history of your country..You my man or woman, are talking about people that don't work, live higher, and more privileged lives than anybody you know, and have never even given their time to try and see if the country folk may need a loaf of bread..Yet you Brits and other asshole Europeans, lavish praise and honor on these antiquated, dukes, duchesses, princes, queens and archdukes.. Read that last sentence asshole, sounds like a line up for a Disney Movie..That royalty bullshits time has come and gone, when are you people going to get it...?? Oh yeah, I bid 800.00 on the Queens Knickers, I am going to fly them over the Ville..
Goodnite queeny, I am sure you will have another breakfast in bed, with fresh squeezed orange juice and eggs over very easy with beans..It is really a shame that ye can't shit in the old loo..That is one thing us commoners have over you..We shit...
Who reads this shit??
HATOONA MATTADA MEERE!!!!! HEY SIMPLE I AM ONE WRECKED MEERE KAT!! YEAH, DUDE YOU LOOK IT..COME ON SIMPLE LETS LOCK DOWN AND WATCH THE PHILS...CAN'T DO IT MEERE...STOP FUCKIN WHININ, THEY PLAYED THIS AFTERNOON..IN FACT WON ON A WALK OFF BY UNDER PANTS....(that's what the critters call Hunter Pence)..I am wrapping this up too much shitty talk today, and too much talk about underwear, let's get into some really classy material tomorrow..UHMMM!! that will take me awhile to come up with something classy, but I will try my best...
STAY OUT OF HARMS WAY MY FRIENDS.
TAPS....
Well you Limies always stick up for the Queen.I told a British Royal Marine on Okinawa Fuck the Qween and his Responce was..... Well Mate that's all you know "Ya Can't even approach Her"
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