"TODAY IS THE 28TH DAY AND LAST VODKADAY OF DECEMBER IN THE YEAR OF OUR LORD 2012."

It Is Now Post Time.
We're Off...Well my main man Plain will be off shortly, once again he is baling on me to go on one of those cruise ships to all ports south. I want to go on a cruise with the crew and take a ship going to AnnisBurg Island...I hear there a bunch of assholes that live there..I would like to see an Island that is inhabited by nothing but assholes...Believe me, I have seen towns, cities, communities and even countries whose population is 90% assholes...Now a trip to an Island whose population is 100% asshole...WOW!! My Drill Instructor always said that there is always that 10% and he was right..but it says on the brochure 100% asshole populated...gotta go...AND NO, EVERYBODY I WILL NOT FIT RIGHT IN..Got together last Friday at ECKS with the whole crew, and Brother Bill Keenan was coming down to see everybody after his brain surgery, so Simple decides to put Staples across my forehead so he wouldn't be the only one there with Staples in his head,,so I tape about fifty Staples across my head and everybody is hilarious and in walks Billy and Beth, and he looks at me and bends over laughin, straightens up and smacks the staples into my head...YO WHAT THE FUCK BILL, I DID THIS SO YOU WOULDN'T BE THE ONLY ONE HERE WITH STAPLES IN YOUR HEAD..He said the only one here with Staples in his head is YOU...I had mine taken out this morning!!!LO!!!  Well me and Phil are starting to move everything to the new Bunker, yep, right up the dirt road from the old one..Just a lot bigger space for warehousing..He is yelling right now....SIMPLE, SIMPLE WHERE ARE YA??? Down here Phil...I KNEW YOU WERE DOWN THERE...How did you know that Phil??? BECAUSE YOUR NOT UP HERE!!!!PHEW!!!The shit I gotta put up with around here...When this move is finally over, I hope to get PLAIN AND SIMPLE back to the elite status we had established across the world..If anybody can do it Me and Plain can..Have a great VODKADAY..!!!!!

"TODAY IS THE 25TH DAY OF DECEMBER "CHRISTMAS DAY" IN THE YEAR OF OUR LORD 2012..

It Is Now Post Time..
We're Off..Hate too usurp my fellow citizens, as I have been derelict in my duties...but I want to wish them all a Merry Christmas...I would also like to wish my wonderful friend JESUS, A HAPPY B'DAY.. This is a special day, and please try to enjoy it to the best of your abilities...and I will end this short post with a joke that I made up, yep an original Simple...First Sheep says BAHHH ....and the Second Sheep said HUMBUG!!!!!  Look, Look, the little kids are laughing their asses off..and my daughter and son in law are saying,,,your really not putting that on the Blog.. No, of course not...MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYBODY,, LOVE YA...

CHRISTMAS EVE.....YOU KNOW THE DATE.....2012

A little blast from the past Christmas Card.........Hope everyone in the Ville has a great Christmas and don't be afraid to RE-GIFT..........Enjoy all.........                                    MERRY CHRISTMAS...... 

Well it's the second Day after the end of the world

These Mayans piss me off !!!!!They said Friday was the end of the world and i didn't bother to buy any Christmas presents.Now all the fucking Malls will be filled with Mayans buying everything up.Then we go off the Fiscal cliff come january 1st. Throws up my hands, and it is rumored that the Mayans are blaming George Bush.

            But anywho I do have some good news for ya the year 2013 is the Year of the Mush nods yep it is.Everything  you lossers bet on will turn to the Midas touch.It's the year of the losser but you can only bet 13 Dollars if you bet any more or any less you will lose. Just rember 13 is your lucky number< alot of people think it is unlucky because of things like Dan marino was the greatest Quaterback ever but never won mla Super Bowl,and there were 13 people present at the last supper, and mmmm there is 13 steps leading to the Gallows,and let us not fotget the Guillotine falls 13 feet nods yep and there is 13 knots in a hangmans noose.And the fear of the number 13 is called Paraskevidekatriaphobia, but you dont have to worry about the number 13 if you can pronounce it.Shrugs and walks away..............i'll be back to teach everyone how to pronounce it for 13 bucks later on.

"Today Is The First Day After The End Of The World"

It Is Now Post Time.
We're Off.. Sitting here with a near and dear brother of mine Robert Butchie Witkowski, and he is amazed at the musings here at the Ville..I don't really care that he is amazed,  I am not going to show him how to comment..He took me home with him last night to cook me breakfast and fed me a piece of hard ham on stale white bread, then said goodnite..What the fuck man, I hear him telling Maggie (one of my favorite people) Good news bad news. The good new we finally got rid of that rotten ham and stale bread...Bad news, we didn't get rid of Simple..He is still on the couch drinkin that skunked beer we had since the last time he was here...seems like just yesterday but in reality it was about 20 fuckin years ago...OK.,,back to Simple, hey Butchie fuck you...get me another beer..Butch wants to get into this Ville so bad that he now is coming up with his mundane musings at Simples expense..He just said if you go to Valley Forge it says George Washington slept here...Simple is the George Washington of Manayunk...all my brothers are comedians...SERIOUS MOMENT...My friends are the funniest and wittiest people that I have ever met..no comedian, no sitcom, no movie nothing, has ever made me laugh more than my friends. I love them all dearly...WHERE THE FUCK IS THE GENERAL???? There General, Me and Butchie did this for you.....

Today Is The 22nd Day Of November "THANKSGIVING" In The Year Of Our Lord 2012"

   It Is Now Post Time
We're Off....Yep, Thanksgiving, and what do we have to be thankful for...??  I am sure if you dig deep enough you will find something...Me I am just Thankful that I am still here, enough said...Do you know they slaughtered 45 million turkeys this week...that is a lot of Turkeys..I heard the last one said, Hey what about Dick and Harry???? chit knee slapper..call 911...Yeah this was the day the 53 surviving Pilgrims out of the original 104 celebrated surviving the first winter...The Indians off the Massachusetts coast heard the gunfire and sent out a war party to slay the intruders,but when they got there they saw it was just a party, so they joined in, they shoulda shot up the joint...the year was 1621...only a few decades later the Indians or Native Americans were being bought out, thrown out or killed for their land...I will save the rest  for another day.
 Little known fact...The Pilgrims never saw a pumpkin before and thought it was a fruit of the devil...When one Indian, Chief Qualanaga, split it open with his hatchet, took the seeds and passed them around...then he placed the pulp in a clay bowl  and a pilgrim spread a bunch of wheat curd on top....when the chief put it on the fire...the smell was so good the Pilgrims knew it was not from the devil and as they all partook of this pumpkin delicacy the head Pilgrim said very TastyKake, yep the very first TastyKake was born...and it thrives today even as Twinkies and other assorted delicacies bite the dust...Well I know you all will be biting more than dust today,, so wherever you are, and whatever you are doing, have a GREAT THANKSGIVING.......We here at PLAIN AND SIMPLE are THANKFUL TO ANYONE THAT READS THIS SHIT..
"HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE..."

"Today Is The 16th Day Of November In The Year Of Our Lord 2012"

"It Is Now Post Time"
We're Off..
My apologies to The Critters for not taking care of the Ville lately, just had so much happening with storms and power and viruses and , and, and, having to work with Plain..Real quick., we have to move 20 tons of material, two cab over diesels 34 foot. hydraulic lifts, the whole works on these rigs..I am driving one, and now who is going to drive the other..I know it ain't Phil and the only other one staring at me is Plain..So I started yelling MEERE!!!!! Plain steps forward and says I'll drive it, I reluctantly said OK, stay right behind me, about a 35 mile trip..we get to the loading docks, and I back the truck into the dock, jump out run up to Plains truck and yell in, let me back it in...PLAIN., SMIRKS, YEAH HE REALLY DOES THAT, AND SAYS I'LL BACK IT IN.  I SAID PLAIN NO, NO, NO, ....MAN IS INCORRIGIBLE.. SO THERE HE GOES TWIRLING THIS RIG AROUND AND DOWN THE RAMP AND BUMP!!!! RIGHT UP AGAINST THE DOCK...I OPEN THE DOOR AND AS I AM ABOUT TO CONGRATULATE HIM...HE SMIRKS AGAIN AND SAYS....NOT BAD FOR A GUY THAT NEVER DROVE ONE OF THESE BEFORE..What a treasure you really are Plain..I would like you to read a message my niece sent me via email and my reply..I would like your thoughts on this subject if you get the time...


This was written by Ben Stein, then Simple replied.....hope  you enjoy...







 little sanity please...






     Only  hope we find GOD again before it is too late ! !



The  following was written by Ben Stein and recited by him on CBS
Sunday  Morning  Commentary.

My confession:

I don't like getting pushed around for being a  Jew, and I don't think
Christians like getting pushed around for  being Christians.  I think
people who believe in God are  sick and tired of getting pushed
around, period.  I have no  idea where the concept came from, that
America is an explicitly  atheist country.  I can't find it in the
Constitution and I  don't like it being shoved down my throat...

Or maybe I  can put it another way: where did the idea come from that
we  should worship celebrities and we aren't allowed to worship God
as we understand Him?  I guess that's a sign that I'm  getting old,
too.  But there are a lot of us who are  wondering where these
celebrities came from and where the  America we knew went to.

In light of the many jokes we  send to one another for a laugh, this
is a little  different:  This is not intended to be a joke; it's not
funny, it's intended to get you thinking.
    In  light of recent events... terrorists attack, school shootings,
 etc..  I think it started when Madeleine Murray O'Hare (she  was
murdered, her body found a few years ago) complained she  didn't want
prayer in our schools, and we said OK.  Then  someone said you better
not read the Bible in school...   The Bible says thou shalt not kill;
thou shalt not steal, and  love your neighbor as yourself.  And we
said  OK.

Then Dr. Benjamin Spock said we shouldn't spank our  children when
they misbehave, because their little personalities  would be warped
and we might damage their self-esteem (Dr.  Spock's son committed
suicide).  We said an expert should  know what he's talking about..
And we said  okay..

Now we're asking ourselves why our children have  no conscience, why
they don't know right from wrong, and why it  doesn't bother them to
kill strangers, their classmates, and  themselves.

Probably, if we think about it long and hard  enough, we can figure it
out.  I think it has a great deal  to do with 'WE REAP WHAT WE SOW.'

Funny how simple it is  for people to trash God and then wonder why
the world's going to  hell.  Funny how we believe what the newspapers
say, but  question what the Bible says.  Funny how you can send
'jokes' through e-mail and they spread like wildfire, but when  you
start sending messages regarding the Lord, people think  twice about
sharing.  Funny how lewd, crude, vulgar and  obscene articles pass
freely through cyberspace, but public  discussion of God is suppressed
in the school and workplace.

Are you laughing yet?

Funny how when you forward  this message, you will not send it to many
on your address list  because you're not sure what they believe, or
what they will  think of you for sending it.

Funny how we can be more  worried about what other people think of us
than what God thinks  of us.







My Best Regards,  Honestly and  respectfully,

Ben  Stein






This Is Me Simple, yeah thats right Simple....(my Family calls me Butch, of course Plain and Streebs already knew that, just don't tell Butchie, he will change his name to SimpleSKI!!)
Thanks for sharing Mimster, miss you,..See I do believe in God in my own way, much as I believe that everyone else should believe in God in their own way..if they choose too believe in God, at all (I was once told that the deepest part of hell is reserved for the people, that harm children, and people,  that deny the existence of God, whether that is true or not, I don't know, it does not apply to me, I will be driving the bus too hell for other reasons..)..let me explain further and on a more simplified scale..I don't give a fuck what your religious beliefs are, I don't care if you worship trees..that is your choice and I will honor it as such, now don't ask me nor denigrate what my religious beliefs are, and we both can have a nice life..believing in what we want without having to make sure other people believe what we believe...I do not believe in Religion...., I do state here and now to my Goddaughter, that I do believe in God and studied the life of Jesus Christ in a Philosophy course for three years. The difference in this study about Jesus was, we studied his life as a man, not as a God. and after reading and listening to what he believed in, and his words on subjects ranging from Heaven to Hell, if people want to believe he is not the Son Of God so be it..if he is not, he is the closest thing that God would ever have as a Son, so why not believe it..I do...In closing I would like to give you an example of this mans life..Children in ancient times were nothing more than chattel, to be raised to work in the fields or at their trade, for days on end..some were actually just killed if they could not work, some were sold by their parents into slavery.. This was the plight of the human child and it was the way society operated..Until one man, yep, Jesus stood up and told the masses, "THAT IT WOULD BE BETTER FOR A MAN TO WRAP A ROPE AROUND HIS NECK WITH AN ANCHOR ON IT AND JUMP INTO THE SEA, THAN TOO HARM A CHILD...!!!! WHAT??? WHAT DID HE JUST SAY??!!!  No one had ever stood up for children before, he was the first, and as people started to follow him, and believe in his teachings the plight of the young was destined for change..He was the first advocate of children's rights, and THEE greatest Man that ever lived...I Love You and I hope to see you over the Holidays..and whatever God you believe in, drop a prayer for your old Uncle..I would appreciate it..Say Hi to the Family.

Love You.
Uncle Butch..

 VODKADAY!!!

Today is the 8th of November in the year of Our Lord 2012

Hmmmmm again no Simple for 7 Days, shrugs.What is there to talk about ?How about Dumb things people say or asked like mmmmm, this,or......
1 When someone says same difference...how could it be the same if it's different?
2 I thought to myself.......wtf who else you going to think too?
3 I saw it with my own eyes......again whos else's eyes you going to see it with?
4 You wanna here something funny ?..........no asshole tell me something that will depress the shit out of me , and ruin my day.
5 It's always in the last place you look.........well no shit, why would you keep looking if you found it already!
6 We Can agree to disagree...................Yea we can but I disagree with that dumb ass statement
7 Dumber than a doorknob..........what makes ya think a Toilette seat is any smarter than a doorknob?
8 Curiosity killed the Cat.........mhmmmmm and a explosive diarrhea killed a fucking elephant.......what we should'nt look into things, like the dumb ass People that vote in America!
9 Cross that Bridge when we get to it.............no dipshit cross it now way before you get there......Holds out my Hands............comonnnnnnnnnnn man!
10 Last but not least a pair of pants....why because we have two legs ?.well guess what we have two arms too, why isn't it.I'm putting on a pair of coats, or a Pair of Shirts........throws up my Hands and  walks out.

"Today Is The 1st Day Of November In The Year Of Our Lord 2012."

"SAMPLE VAKE UP!!!! SOMEBODY GETTA GOT A DACTAR!!! HE IST STILL NOT VAKING UP!!!! HATOON(CRYING) MATTADA SIMPLE, sob sob HE IST DAD!!! NAHHHHHH!!
GRRR!!! COME ON MY MAN WAKE UP!!!!! YOU HAVE BEEN SLEEPING FOR A WEEK!!!!! ARK!!! LET THE FUCK DIE, LET THE FUCK DIE!!!!!!!!!!!! Mumbling going on in my head (as usual)..here that fuckin parrott, and Plain....what the fuck is going on....SAMPLE!!! SAMPLE!!! HE IST MOVIN...YEOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!! What the fuck are you all doing in the bunker!!!!!!!! YAY DANG DING SAMPLE IST BACK THE WISE OLD SAMPLE THE NUTTY OLD SAMPEL DANG DING THE WICKED SAMPLE IST BACK....!!!!!!Whoa Blat, Slat what is going on??? SAMPLE YOU GOT REALLY DRANK AND RAN INT THE PINE BARRENS WITH SOME SKENK....Uhmmm!! was she that bad!!!! HAAHHAHHAH!!!OH SHE VOST BAD SAMPLE....DEN VE LOOKED FOR YOU AND YOU HAD A BIG LAMP ON YOUR HAD, AND SOME GUY NAMED SPIKE HAT YOU AT HIST HOUSE....VE BROUGHT YOU TO THE BANKER LAST VEEK...Wait a minute what date and day is it....VOT YOU MEAN, DATE AND DAY. VOT KINDA LUNCHWAGE IS DOT..Never mind help me up, and why are you all in the bunker???THERE VOST A HARRICANE...Yeah right....looking around the bunker, see my puter, it is Nov. 1st All Saints Day....I MISSED HALLOWEEN!!!!!!!!! HEY E!!! Phil what happened...WHAT DO YOU MEAN??? What do I mean it is Nov. 1st dude, I been out for a fuckin week!! and you ask me what do I mean....YEAH WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL...PLAIN WAS PASSED OUT FOR TWO DECADES AND HE AIN'T MEAN...Dude I ain't fuckin mean. I am pissed I missed Halloween....YOU DIDN'T MISS IT....Hey Phil today is All Saints Day. that is the day after Halloween....YEAH BUT HALLOWEEN WASN'T YESTERDAY, IT IS SATURDAY....What the fuck do you mean???????? WELL YESTERDAY WAS HALLOWEEN BUT IT WASN'T......Staring once again in total disbelief....Yesterday was Halloween but it wasn't.....YEP IT IS SATURDAY....My computer says it is Thursday.....NO HALLOWEEN IS SATURDAY..I thought you said it was yesterday but it wasn't uhmmmm, please somebody help me.....IT IS SATURDAY IT WAS CANCELLED BY  THE WICKED WITCH OF THE NORTH....Who is this wicked witch of witch you speak?????? SANDY SIMPLE, HURRICANE SANDY!!!! I gotta go back to sleep Phil, this is nuts (no shit),,,where is Plain?? Did I see Plain?? Did Plain work  with me??? Who was that asshole boss???? I think it may have been Butchie.....gotta rest and get my thoughts together.. This place doesn't even look familiar....ZZZZZZZzzzz....

Todays the 31st of October in the Year Of Our Lord 2012

 Well here it is Halloween the last Day of October and Simple can't be found! shrugs......This is the one Holiday I hate, all these gouls and ghosts running around and it's raining it prolly will dampen there SPIRTS haaaaaaaaaaaaaa GAWD dampen their spirts a real Knee slapper.But really I hate halloween and all the monsters especially the Mummy why was every one so scared of Him ? Who the fuck could he catch ?That slow ass dragging his foot and people  run screaming and they get caught what Bullshit . I'll tell ya what I think about the Mummy .......it Sphinx lolllllllllllllllllllllllllll haaaaa haaaaaaaaaaa ohhhhhhhhhhhh chit I did it again call 911. I'm killing myself.

Today is the 30th of october in the Year Of Our Lord 2012 nods yep it is

 Hey McOpen, how Are Ya? And don't worry about Simple , looks around and smirks but he was the Boss I was talking about.Trust me James being Retired is like being parolled.
        Anywho this storm of the Centry, wasn't shit. Main Street didn't even get flooded and Upper Darby Creek didn't over flow. Hell with Hazel we had Boats  parked outside our House.I saw Wally Tab going down the street like he was in a Gondola.But seriously i hope everyone is safe. If anyone needs Batteries , gallons of water and duct tape let me know!I'm off to find Simple jumps up in the air and clicks my heels together.............................I'll be back

Today is Monday the 29th of october in the Year of Our Lord 2012

 Struts into the ville...........strut .......strut .........strut........welllllllllllll I'll tell ya Simple has been in. dereliction of his duties. Nods yep he has, so here I am again picking up for him and doing all his work! And Ive been working myself and haven't had time to get on here.Yep I came out of retirement and have been working for  some real asshole. Bosses are like diapers always on your ass and usually full of shit. But there was no work today Because of SANDY but they wont say Sandy who.There saying this Sandy is worse than Hazel. Holds out my hands Hazel WHO? Wtf  I need last names holds out my hands and shrugs.Any who it's been raining for two Days now and they say it going to rain til Wensday pftttttttt how can ya Golf in this shit ? pisses me off. We were all just down wildwood last week and all it did was rain and  the wind  was  blowing like hell.I went up to see the Ocean and all it did was wave, smirks .But it was windy as Hell out there and  the wind even told  this one Coconut tree hold on to your nuts this isn't going to be your regular Blow job...............does a guy chuckle and  walks  off...........................Im'a look for Simple................later

"Today Is The 18th Day Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2012"

It Was Post Time..
We were off...WAIT TILL YOU HEAR THIS!!!! HEAR YE!!! HEAR YE!!!!  Left the boys down North Wildwood fishing and biking..Returned home and worked balls to the wall all week, to go back down tonite until Saturday...SO WHAT MESSAGE DO I GET????  Hey Simple we are leaving....You are leaving??? Why??? Why the fuck are you leavin??? What has become of my troops..Have to leave for a couple of days and the vacation is off...Sure did enjoy that one...can't wait till next year...See ya in the Yunk!! PHEW THE SHIT I GOTTA PUT UP WITH AROUND HERE!!!

TODAY IS THE 15TH DAY OF OCTOBER 2012 A.D.

Well I found out where boys/men are for today and tomorrow......Yep  I figured this is where they would be for their annual trip...........

I'm sure they want a front row seat for this one.....They all have different opinions on Politics with Plain and Simple leading the way....

They should find their way to the Dorms for some libations with some of the students.....or to discuss the future of the Country..........

Keep an eye out for them on TV to be polite of ushered out of the Town Hall Meeting.............

Stay safe

TODAY IS SUNDAY THE 14th DAY IN OCTOBER 2012 A.D.

I suppose the boys are ok....Nothing on Action News.........But Jail might be in the cards for the Merry Marauders....I hope not but with their history who knows.......If they do end up in the pokey here are some suggestions....

The Good Jail........

Uniform of the day for the boys..............Which County.............That is a judgement call.........Somewhere in the USA.......

TAPS   Stay Safe Citizens................

TODAY IS THE 13TH DAY OF OCTOBER 2012 A.D.

Today is the 13th and departure day for the Merry Marauders.......Off they go....the question is did they tell Simple the truth about their destination..........A little but of Simples day>>>>>>>>

First the Subway ride he was told to take and directions.......

Next the train he was to catch for their/his trip

Now a nice shot form the Engine, as Simple left the Dining Car and was schmoozing with the Engineer....Go figure.........

Finally Simple arriving at his destination...............ALONE AGAIN...NATURALLY.........

Lets hope he has his cell on so he can meet up with someone....Maybe the Marauders before Friday is here.

Any Hoo.......The Ville is OK and we are all hoping a good time is had by all......I 'm sure they will...........Later

"Today Is The 12th Day Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2012."

It Is Now Post Time.
We're Off...Is it Vodkaday, if there is no vodka?? I can't answer that rather difficult philosophical question.  I do know there is a postponement, until tomorrow, but then I just found out we won't get there till Wednesday.... North Dakota!!! Yep, Babe confirmed it last night...Our annual Florida trip is heading North..I can't wait..I was never in North Dakota, as a matter of fact, I was never in South, West or even East Dakota..Babe told me it is nice in the Black Hills this time of year, maybe a little more chilly than Florida, but he says I dress for North Dakota when we go to Florida..So tonite sometime I will get a train out of 30th street station and head West young man..I will get there Wednesday, and leave Thursday, so I can get back to work..That is about it, hope we here from Plain, but I know he is packing..Man over packs everywhere we go...Pack on or Whack on whatever it is you are doing today my crazy brother..Everybody else have a great Friday...I hear the train a comin!!

"Today Is The 11th Day Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2012."

It Is Now Post Time.
We're Off....ARK!!! LOOK AT THAT SIMPLE FUCK TRYING TO DO A POST REAL FAST!! LOOK AT THAT SIMPLE FUCK TRYING TO DO A POST REAL FAST!!!!!! Hey Greeney ever hear the song shotgun..well here it comes fucker...SWOOP!!!!!! Man I wish I could fly..What man could fly ?without the use of a machine...non other than: LOOK UP IN THE SKY!!!!! IT'S A PARROT IT'S A PLAIN NO IT'S SUPERMAN.....SUPERMAN FASTER THAN A SPEEDING BULLET ,,,MORE POWERFUL THAN A LOCOMOTIVE, ABLE TO LEAP TALL BUILDINGS IN A SINGLE BOUND!!! YES IT'S SUPERMAN...Little known fact, you don't see much of Superman anymore, you know why?? He got caught masturbating in a phone booth, yep, he took of his Clark Kent suit  (shh, that is his secret identity and, nobody knows it but me, I promised him I wouldn't tell anybody)   , and as he was getting into his SuperMan suit, Lois Lane walked by and said....WOW!! WHAT A SUPER PACKAGE,  Well as you can imagine, the man of steel, became the real man of steel, and couldn't help himself as he grabbed hold of his pole and when he goes off it is Super, and yep,  Lois reported the super pervert, too the Daily Planet and Perry White sent the cops  in with Kryptonite grenades and they threw them in the phone booth, the last I heard he was going in jail with Scumdusky and he was super horny,,have a good time KA-EL from Krypton and you too Jer, you fucking pervert.  I cannot believe they gave this guy 30 years.. I wonder when he is eligible for parole..he should have gotten the noose..Well, I guess we will .leave his final fate to Superman, or LeRoy Brown, or anybody else that can fuck him up...See ya Scumdusky, take up your appeal when you meet Mr. J.C. from all accounts he really loved little children..and when I drive that bus too hell I hope you are on it..NO APPEAL!! NO TV!! NO MATTRESS!! JUST YOU AND SUPERPACKAGE OR LEROY...Hey if you guys like super heroes, or have a favorite one tell us about him...if not don't.....Thank Phil., for that last statement...

I got one:  What is with that Green Lantern guy, can he fly or anything of that nature. I don't get what is so great about him, and this may piss some people off, but what is with BatMan, he don't have any powers. He is a joke...or joker...UHMM...also you know BatMan and Robin are big fans of jeopardy..They play it backwards.., like ask a question give the answer...
ROBIN QUESTION??? "WHAT'S THAT YOUR STICKING IN MY MOUTH BATMAN....
BATMAN ANSWER::::  A COCK ROBIN!!!! hahahhaahh chit 911 oh oh ahhhahah...A COCK ROBIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

"Today Is The 10th Day Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2012"

It Is Now Post Time.
We're Off...Tried to get a post done yesterday, and was sabotaged by work..(sucks)..Anyway all that shit I took about Columbus Day. I have a phrase for him.. FUCK YOU!!! How the fuck do you discover somewhere, where 20 million people are living...European explorers, my ass, the true explorers are at LaSalle..hahahhha...Really think about it, what did the Europeans really ever discover..South America, I don't think so, there were all kinds of indgenious people living there..some of them don't look like people but they are..North America, don't even go there..China, sure Marco..The Pacific Ocean, yeah right Balboa..you discovered nothing.. The Bora Borans and them Tahitians were sailing the Pacific Ocean when Balboa was just Bal...The history we were taught is false, the religion, that is up to you..Science, hey test until proven right, then test again, a lot of the theories we were taught have been proven wrong..Dinasaurs are related to birds, and not reptiles..WOW!!! and how about ARITHMATIC....Handed down from the Greek Philosopher, Arithmaticus, now there is a genius....We all know figures don't lie.. As for European Explorers they all lied.....later...














1

"Today Is The 8th Day Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2012"

It Is Now Post Time.
We're Off...Heading for the Ville this morning, first time since Wednesday.  Can't wait too see what condition my condition is in.. Had a really good weekend..(I Think) if anyone watched the video of Ernst and Villhelm, they would know that those two guys are really into their German heritage...they are not very discreet..Kudos to the photographer one Floyd  Von Flahjershmidt..and a cheering section of one Mate LavenDorfer and Thomas Johan  Johnsonfugell...Thanks to everyone involved, and today I would like to do all things Germanic..You know such as Ireland, England, France, Belgium, Holland, just about half of Europe and also much of America. The German people don't get the courtesies they deserve. Why?? Why?? you ask...I really can't answer that in one word..,but it may have something to do with basically starting two World Wars and in the process, destroying all of Europe..well that is a start...Heading for the Ville. With Phil The Thrill....

"Today Is The 7th Day Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2012."

It Is Now Post Time.
We're Off. Two of my favorite Aliens, I mean Aryans..
OTTO VON KEUBLER AND VILHELM KEENANSHNITZEL...!!
Celebrating October Fest...
Enjoy!!  Click on Happy Octoberfest and CELEBRATE

Happy Octoberfest!

Today is October 5th In the Year Of Our LOrd 2012

Well here it is the 5th and still no Simple. But I do hear that there were sightings of him at the Nights Of Columbus,CJ& Ecks and Hadel Taylors.But back to the 5th, on this Day you wont belive what Happened the Pope and Obuma were Together And the Pope Pointed out to the crowd and said to Obuma I can just swing my arm and make this crowd happy as anything just one wave of my hand! And Obuma goes I dont think so, let me see you do it.So the Pope swings and suckers punches Obuma and drops him . The crowd went wild and clapped for 20 minutes, they laughed for half and Hour. ................and any Taxpayer that Votes for Obuma is like a chicken voting for Col. Sanders are you fucking crazy ?

Today is the 4th day of October, 2012...A.D...

Plain.....McFinn.....Plain.....McFinn.....Plain.....McFinn ...

His Missingness is at it again Plain......Maybe he is whacking his balls......In a Semi........With Phil.......Driving around YORK.....Looking for directions.......or Direction........

Phil and Simple having a Mc Moment in York,,,,,,,

Maybe they went to the track.......This could be their Trifecta ,,,,,,,A bevy of beautifies,,,

Simples rquest for peace and quiet........The arachnids will prevail.......

Some back Simple.........Mitt and Obama need your help........They are both stuck in a rut.......

"Today Is The 3rd Day Of October In The Year Of Our Lord 2012."

It Is Now Post Time.
We're Off...If I was at the Ville, I would probably be cleaning out cobwebs and spiders, but still remote since Sunday.  Today I had the pleasure of spending roughly six hours in a truck with Phil The Thrill, who today has made his official entry into the menagerie. If this fucker ain't a critter, the critters ain;t critters..I know where I am going, as I stop to get a coffee on the Turnpike, really want to get to PipersVille before 11..So I grab a coffee and an oatmeal, slurp down the meal..go take a leak and ready to move...Where is he, Yo Ern, look at this map, this is where we were yesterday...Yeah so what?? How about that being on a map??  Phil most places in the world are on a map...YEAH, BUT WE WEREN'T THERE YESTERDAY...Weren't where??  MOST OF THE PLACES IN THE WORLD..Dude can we go??  NO,. CHECK IT OUT WE WERE RIGHT HERE..VROOMMMMMMMM!! I look in the rear view mirror and see him run out..lookin all around, back up to get him..HE SAYS. WAIT I WANT TOO SEE IF WHERE WE ARE GOING TODAY IS ON THAT MAP....YEOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!

Today is the 3rd Of October In The Year OF OUr Lord 2012

Looks around and dont see any Simpleton shrugs,wellllllllllll since it's the 3rd we will go with  that. Yep anything to do with the number 3.Thinks, lets see here. Okay got it'
3 strikes your out
3rd times a charm
the 3rd wheel
3rd rock from the sun
Three's a crowd
3 lil bears
 3 lil pigs
3 blind mice
3 musketeers
3 stooges
3 wishes
3 wise Men
So lets hear em , any 3 will do for me...............I'm outta here, time to wack my Balls...................... where the Hell is Simple?

Well Today is October 2nd in the Year Of Our Lord 2012

 Well there's no Simple so I am Back to work on this Blog. Hmmmm what can I tell you about October 2nd ? Lets see, back in 1962 The Johnny Carson Show started on Oct. 2nd. And Rock Hudson died in his sleep on the 2nd back in 1985, yep he did.And Rock beat out Yogi Berra for taking more balls off his chin than anyone else.And the comic strip Peanuts started on Oct 2nd back in 1950, and Graucho Marx was Born way back in 1890.Why lots of things Happened on the 2nd. Our State was the 2nd to Join the union, they must of been in a hurry and  had  some sexest name all the towns around the State, he had to be a sick fucker. I'll name some for ya,You can also slide some on in here if ya want.
1 Bath
2 Balltown
3 Bath Addition
4 Beaver
5 Big Beaver
6 Bird in Hand
7 Blue Ball..if ya had Bird in Hand a long time of course ya had Blue Ball
8 Climax
9 Desire
10 Intercourse
11 Paradise
12 Slate Lick
13 Virginville....... I MEAN COME ON MAN YA CAN'T MAKE THIS SHIT UP....and ya heard it all here on Plain and Simple...........who Reads this Shit ?

Well mmmmmmm today is October 1st, In the Year Of Our Lord 2012

Yup thats what it is Oct.1st September is gone and  done, it's History.Lets see there's Two Holidays in October. The 8th is Columbas Day, he's the Guy that discovered some West Indians. He got lost coming to America. I think he finally made his way to Nith Street in South Philly, shrugs
         Then there's halloween that falls on the 31st. I used to love Halloween I must be too old for it now. Things just aren't the same ! How do you know when you get too old for Halloween ? I'll give ya a few hints. When people open the door and you yell Trick or  ahhhhhh nshit because you forgot the rest. Or you need someone to chew your candy for you. Then there's when someone drops a candy bar in your bag and you lose your Balance. orrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr when your the only Power Ranger on the block with a Walker give it the fuck up.................................smirks and  walks off whistling sweet georgia Brown.

"Today Is The 30th Day Of September In The Year Of Our Lord 2012."

  It Is Now Post Time
We're Off..Goodbye for ever old fellows and gals, goodbye forever old sweethearts and pals, God Bless them all, gee but I'd give the world too see that old gang of mine, that sweet quartet that used to sing, Sweet Caroline, and goodbye forever September 2012, onward Christian Soldiers and the all the citizens and critters of the Ville..Into October we stumble, and I do mean stumble...NO PHILS!!! playing in October, the younger fans get a little taste of what we had growing up, never in October was our motto...Still love the  Phils, and if they could stop getting wounded they still have a great chance for the Post Season again next year..I think they should pay Chipper Jones whatever he wants to come on in and play third for one more season.  How cool would that be??? 1st. Base Ryan Howard   2nd. Base Chase Utley  3rd. Base Chipper Jones  SS. Jimmy Rollins....Dream on Simple..maybe, maybe not...
Beautiful Sunday out here in the Barrens, the critters are heading over to Cont's farm for a hay ride and apple pickin, I'd rather drive to the city... Eagles, Giants used to get me riled up, I could give a fuck..The only interesting aspect is will Vick make it through the game..Here is my prediction.. The Giants should kick their ass, but they won't..Reid and Vick will be big time hero's once again..sickening...
Oh yeah before I go....DID SCUMDUSKY GET SENTENCED YET???? NO HE DID NOT!!! 
Enjoy the day..Scumdusky just had lunch and is watching all the football games...I didn't mean to make your day, but is that sickening, and it just shows the travesty that this countries so called judicial system has become...If this shit doesn't change I am running for office when I grow up....LATER!!!!

"Today Is The 29th Day Of September In The Year Of Our Lord.2012."

It Is Now Post Time.
We're Off.  Hey Plain, Hey McNowhere, Hey Strebor, Hey anyfuckinbody!!!!! don't help out, don't go out of your way, and maybe put a little musing on the wall here at the Ville. Nooooooo! to difficult, let the Simpleton do it....WELL THE SIMPLETON HAS BEEN POUNDING THE FUCKIN HIGHWAYS AND BYEWAYS OF THIS GREAT LAND, WHILE THE ONLY THING YOU DO, YEAH YOU PLAIN IS POUND YOUR BALLS WITH THE REST OF THOSE TOADS...FUCKIN GALL ME MAN.....Anyway, how are ya everybody..me workin again, I knew I was driving the bus to hell, I just didn't know I already did it...nah, life be what it be....
Just found out our annual trip this year is too NORTH WILDWOOD!!! now normally I would pitch a bitch about that,  now don't say anything but,  it is not where you go, but who you are with..that is all that counts..October the13th lift off...Night of October 13th,,. most of us won't know where we are nor will we care...
Saw where some dude killed his wife and boiled her to get rid of the evidence...Must have had some pretty large kitchen utensils. unless he invited the Hot N' Tots and they brought one of those big iron pots and had a cook out...
Saw where that idiot from Iran was preaching Nuclear Fission at the U.N.  drop one on one of his cities, and say see that is why we don't want you to have a nuclear bomb...They can really fuck you up...Hello!! Hello!! Hello!!! Hmmmmm!! no answer.
To the General...WHERE THE FUCK IS THE GENERAL!!!  See you on the 13th, I will get you the best suite available, then me and you will bunk up for the week...I am bringing Meere.....LOL!! Have a good day everybody....

"Today Is The 26th Day Of September In The Year Of Our Lord 2012."

It Is Now Post Time.
We're Off....HELLO OBUMA!! HELLO HILLARY!!! HELLO BIDEN!!!!! Enough apologizing to the muslim world about a movie a muslim made...enough kissing of the ass rhetoric that is all you do with these fuckin arab countries, enough with dissing Israel, you fucks couldn't manage living in that war zone, so leave them alone to handle the threats to their very existence anyway they see fit..Having said that, would you kindly remember in your prayers tonight the American Ambassador who was butchered in Libya during these so called protests (gangs of thugs more like it).. OH!! that's right you don't know his name...Neither do the American people...guess his family will have to pray by themselves...THEY KILLED AN AMERICAN AMBASSADOR!! WHAT IS IT YOU FUCKS DON'T UNDERSTAND!! THEY INVADED OUR COUNTRY..OUR EMBASSIES IN FOREIGN LANDS ARE CONSIDERED OUR COUNTRY AND ARE CONSIDERED SACRED...!!! FUCK THE MOVIE,,,,FUCK THE FUCK THAT MADE IT..,,,FUCK LIBYA!!!! AND LASTLY FUCK ALL  OF YOU!!!! YOU ARE AS LAME AS IT GETS..WE SHOULD HAVE INVADED THOSE ASSHOLES THE NEXT DAY.  TAKEN OUT THEIR KEY CITIES AND TAKEN OVER THE COUNTRY, NOT AS PEACEKEEPERS. NOT AS FRIENDLY FORCES.  AS INVADERS SUCH AS WE NOW OWN YOU...SEE IF ANY OF YOU OTHER RELIGIOUS ZEALOTS WANT TO KILL AN AMERICAN..I honestly can't stand this pussy bullshit this countries politicians allow, and what they allow to be done to our fellow citizens working overseas, it makes me want to puke......These arab fucks are killing and have killed Americans, that we don't know about,, and we do nothing about it, that is an abomination of the sanctity of life that we say we stand for...Beware my friends, because this warning is coming from SIMPLEDAMUS, if this aberrant behavior is going to continue, America, it's citizens and its world assets and holdings are in danger...they have absolutely no fear of Washington, and they definitely have no respect and neither do I....I hope Assad blows his own country off the face of the earth,..YOU GO ASSAD TAKE OUT ANOTHER 20,000 today..THAT'S MY MAN THE MORE HE PUTS DOWN, THEY LESS WE HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT..Hope the joy and hope of the Arab Spring lives on, keep killing each other...

"Today Is The 25th Day Of December In The Year Of Our Lord 2012."

It Is Now Post Time.
We're Off..Let me be the first too say "MERRY CHRISTMAS."  Ahh, you may be laughing at this Simpleton right now, but look at the date...only three months kids, only three months..three months go faster than a wink in a young girls eye.. Been working up the CITY..yep, The Big Apple, yep that one..New York, New York,  Manhattan, East Side West Side all around the town..yep, that one...Times Square...Old New York..talk about jewelers row..now I know why they call it JEWelery..all I saw for blocks were diamonds and gold, silver and emeralds..and Hassidic Jewish people all over the place...I honestly in all of my years knew something like this existed..I was trying to get an evaluation done on old computer soldering sticks..You cannot believe the money on this street..window after window non stop Jewelery...Dudes were coming in the appraisers with buckets of trinkets and getting cash right over the counter..The one place had 20 appraisers working and a line out the door onto W. 47th...man, you wanna talk about Shylock...there he was in all his glory...I don't have a prejudice towards my fellow man...and I am not saying that in this Post...,but follow these Jewish People, and you will run into fortunes you would not fathom..I saw one bracelet selling price 178,000.00 who buys that shit...and who reads this shit.. I know Plain I have been lacking in my duty here at the Ville, but I was remote from 5:30 Sunday until just now...YO!! did I have the pleasure of seeing you over the weekend.....LOL!!!  Hey if ya wanna play.. give me A-Z anything New York.., no rules, but try and keep it to New York City......get ready get set GO!!!
A-wtf.
B-Bowery, as in Boys, you remember. Satch and, Butch. and Bugsy..Maybe that was Burgerville.
C-
D-Diamonds W.47th Holy Shit...
E-East Side.
F-Flat Bush hmmm wonder why??
G-Guggenheim....I believe this is in Manhattan..
H-
I-Indians, what did the Dutch pay 24.00? what a deal......Maybe the Native Americans will buy it back one day, just like they are doing with The Black Hills...

"Today Is The 22nd Day Of September In The Year Of Our Lord 2012."

It Is Now Post Time.
We're Off..Had the pleasure of talking to an old classmate of mine last night..One Jim "Spanky" McFarlane, another of the MCFARLANE BUNCH.. Little known fact..Spanky got said nickname in high school, yep, before that he was just plain Jimmy...When you fucked up in school back in the 60's there was no such thing as sparing the rod...and one of the rod swingers at Roman Catholic was Mr.Fulcomer (little fuck) if I saw him now I would beat his ass with a two by four...another great paddle swinger was Goodyear, an asshole and a sadist...also a so called priest...I digress...Well this little Jimmy McFarlane guy, comes smokin into Roman in 1960, and by the time we left he held the record for Spanks on his East Falls ass...soooooo, the nickname Spanky, pretty clever of us young fellows to come up with that name...Spanky told me he reads Plain and Simple, my words to my Main Man Spanky, just like that lady on Broad Street, said too him years ago..are you fuckin crazy!!...Here's the story,  about when he was joining the service. I think he said 1969. He went down to Broad Street induction center and as he sat before a lady, who he said coulda been our Grandmother, real sedate and well dressed, attractive older woman, she says, you are joining the Army?? He says yep..She says they will send you to Viet Nam..He says yep.. She looks at him long and hard and says WHAT ARE YOU FUCKING CRAZY!!! That shit is hysterical...Viet Nam wasn't...but hey we are here and glad and proud to be here, and this is a place to have fun...God Bless you Spanky and great talkin to you, and to my Main Man Plain, thanks for hooking us up...OK onto much better things than talking about those two nuts...Think me and Phil The Thrill may head over to the Track and catch the Pennsylvania Derby, who ever thought there would be a million dollar race in Pennsy...amazing what a casino can do for the race track...OK I am outta here..have a great weekend.....

"Today Is The 21st Day Of September InThe Year Of Our Lord 2012."

It Is Now Post Time.
We're Off..Emu's and flightless birds...ARK!!  BIRDS THAT CAN'T FLY AIN'T BIRDS!! BIRDS THAT CAN'T FLY AIN'T BIRDS!!!!You just called them birds you flyin bag of shit..ARK!! WHERE IS MY MAIN MAN PLAIN!! WHERE IS MY MAIN MAN PLAIN?????!!!! You want Plain Greeny, hold right there...running into the bunker, grab the shotgun....I got your Plain right here Blabber Beak!!!! Breathe, Relax, Aim, Slack, Squeeze...CLICK!! What the fuck it's empty...ARK!! GOT IN THE BUNKER AND EMPTIED IT!! GOT IN THE BUNKER AND EMPTIED IT!!! Be right back Greeny, fallin over Meere who was really fucked up last nite...Meere, Meere,!!! Where did that parrot hide my shotgun shells....HE PUT THEM IN BILLY'S BAG...son of a bitch....be right there Greeny, walkin out with an axe. ARK!! BETTER PUT THAT DOWN ASSHOLE I AM JUST FLYING AWAY!! BETTER PUT THAT DOWN ASSHOLE I AM JUST FLYING AWAY!!!! Head in my hands, can't take it man, can't take much more..
HEY EVERYBODY, take a look at the front page of the PHILADELPHIA DAILY NEWS..HEADLINES,,,THE LAST PINEY!!!!!!..Old Bill Waslowich..I don't disagree with the Princeton educated writer that wrote about him as a Piney, but I do disagree as the last Piney..He should have delved deeper into those woods, rather than stopping his quest at The Twisted Barrel Gun Club...about 10 miles from the bunker...but that place makes the bunker look like a city.. Old Bill lives at the club and has for decades..they took his pick-up and his license off of him because he refused to get insurance and registration...those two things don't exist where he lives...At one time back in the seventies, they were going to eke out the world's larges airport smack dab in the middle of The Barrens..that would have been a catastrophic mistake...As under this 1.1 million acre oasis is enough fresh water to supply all of New Jersey, Philadelphia, and New York into and beyond the next millennium...Am I a preservationist, I guess in a way, there are certain natural and unnatural things that man should leave alone...and Old Bill, The Pine Barrens, Chatsworth, The Cranberry Farms, The Blueberry Farms, The Rivers, that run through the pines..The Piney Shacks, and last but now least my man Spike...I met Spike back in the seventies, and he worked landscaping with me..You have to picture ZZ Top Beard, Overhauls, Crusty Hat, Hair Down To His Ass, Work Boots. and an accent that would remind you of rural West Virginia...Spike and Me would throw back more than a few and I would tell him about the city and he would tell me about the Pines...When he grew confident with me, he took me to his abode...Let's just say.  Still, for some whiskey. Saw Mill,.,, Shack,, animals and a hospitality to suit royalty..He couldn't do enough to make me comfortable. I just enjoyed him as a human being...He had a saw mill in the pines where you could never find it, and here he would go into the cedar swamps and cut cedar for fencing...you cannot find a better wood for fencing, but you can't get it...we could, and the next move was, me and Spike were doing cedar fencing, until one day an officer of the State Of New Jermany asked us where we were getting the cedar...I stepped in front of Spike and told him we have it imported from Cedar Swamps in Georgia...He asked if we would measure his yard and give him a price...Sure thing officer...Spike loved that and was laughing his balls off at me as usual...He let me run the saw sometimes and holy moly did that thing cut some wood..We made many a trip to the Pic-A-Lily, and he loved baseball..I drifted off into the other business, and I didn't get to see Spike much...,every now and then at the Pic,we would run into each other and reminisce about our out riding fences days....I don't know what happened to my man..but I do know that if he is still around Old  Bill is not the last Piney..Hey Spike wherever you be. thanks for those nights on the back porch with a cold brew watching the sunset and thinking we were forever young.....

"Today Is The 20th Day Of September In The Year Of Our Lord 2012"

It Is Now Post Time.
We're Off..Maybe I should start posting about 3 A.M. I would have more time to think..NahHHHHH! Shut it Billy..Let's see,  jaw operated on, tests on arm still not completed..penicillin, and pain killers..Why kill the pain..Pain is Good, Extreme Pain, is Extremely Good...yeah right..Anyway no more pain killers.., don't like what they do to me..I can look like one but I don't really want to be a zombie....
Little known fact, some Zombies are actually nice...yep Zombie ism, has its roots in equatorial Africa..many centuries ago as Rome was pillaging the known world..African witch doctors, were turning people into Zombies so they could rule over them, and make them their slaves...They concocted a potion so strong that if ingested could make a humans metabolism slow down to barely breathing...thus the other people thought this guy was dead...They would then start stomping their feet into the ground and banging their shields with their spears..they would dance like this for like four days until they were all in a frenzy from sleep deprivation..Then the witch doctor would whack the not so dead dude with a shot of ammonium nitrate, from the nitrate bush, and the dead fucker would jolt upright and stare at the witch doctor and recite everything he told him too say. Like uh .....ew eee eww ahh ahh bing bang wallla walla ding dang and shit like that. The other tribesmen were running over each other to get the fuck out of there..In fact it is said that in one of these stampedes, they ran over so many chimps, that the species was almost extinct...Well let me tell ya somethin, when old witchy walked around with his Zombie stumbling after him, those Watusi's bent and prayed..The witch doctor and his Zombie were kings of the land...Zombie ism arrived in the New World via Haiti, and today you can visit the Southern half of the Island of Hispaniola, and see many Zombies for yourself...the Zombies in Haiti are actually better off than the people..Their metabolism is so slow they don't need a lot of calories to function.. so at anytime day or nite you may see a Zombie stumblin along sucking on a sugar cane root and enjoying life, while the people around him can't find a bowl of rice.  People get out of their way when they come through town. People bow down to them...The only problem with being a Zombie comes with potty training...See Zombies, don't eat that much and their metabolism being one above vegetable, when it comes time to shit, you might not see him for a week...That is the only detriment I can see of becoming a Zombie..Who feels like sittin on a shitter for a week.., and oh yeah, when they have sex it could take months...YIKES..

"Today Is The 19th Day Of September In The Year Of Our Lord 2012."

It Is Now Post Time.
We're Off.. Man I would like to have some time to devote to this Ville, it is getting harder and harder, wish she would get her hand off of it...OOPPPS..didn't mean to go there..I meant the time factor..Sheople that are not into profound musings like myself, and his ever explosiveness Plain can't understand the thought process that goes into these talks and teachings of all things worldly and other worldly happenings...If I had the time Plain has, we would be a universal site for sheople to solve their problems, laugh, sing, dance, fly, gamble, drink, eat, fight, shit, shoot, deliver, talk, educate critters, drink with goats, sleep with MeereKats, fight with parrots and teach the English language to Slavs....,and have sex whenever possible...having said this...       (fuckin fly almost went down my gullet..)   Man I hate fuckin flies...
To fly or not to fly that is the question..
Yesterday, Plain and Myself in our infinite wisdom taught everyone about the history of flight..hope you learned your lessons well, because today you get tested...OK class A-Z anything to do with flight, if you comment go A-Z yourself,, if you want too, remember no rules..The Slavs want to play this should be good..... ...Hey if you visit hope you have a laugh, as you fly around the Ville..If I do one thing positive today, it will be killing this shit eater before I swallow him...
A-  AirPLAIN
B-  Blimp...Little known fact this is the flying contraption that PopEye's buddy Blimpie got his nickname from,, yep...you can look it up on PopEye Trivia hmmmmmm good thought for another day,  Olive...
C-Chopper..not the motorcycle,, thee Chopper..
D-Dirigable  that is another nickname for Blimpie.
E-
F- Flyin Fuck as in, I don't give a....
G-
H- Huey,,,,,Helicopter see Chopper
I-
J-Jet
K-Kite as in Benjamin Franklin or why don't you go fly one.., or stick one, like who the fuck fly's kites..I never went and flew a kite...I flew over a cuckoo's nest once...ARK THAT WAS MY COUSINS NEST YOU PRICK!! THAT WAS MY COUSINS NEST YOU PRICK!! Head down, almost in tears, what did I do wrong God??  Come on God quit laughin.....
L-
M-Moon Module or Mars Module, or anytype of module that fly's..Did I tell you how much I hate fuckin flies....??
N
O-Osprey, see Helicopter ,,  Chopper,  and Jet above.
P
Q
R
S-uhmmmmmmmm
T-Twin Engine little known fact there is also a Siamese Twin Engine, these engines have been known to stick together no matter the circumstances..you can't pry them apart with a jack hammer..some of them are attached at the propeller and they really cause a lot of issues...some are attached at the rear, and what a mess that can make, P U when that gas backs up...speaking of backs some are attached at the back and you never can tell what one or the other is doing..these are dangerous types of engines because almost simultaneously, if one goes so does the other.. so if you ever fly in a twin engine, make sure it is not a Siamese...you will thank us here at Plain and Simple, believe me..
U
V
W
X
Y
Z-Zeplin..See Blimpie, man how many fuckin names do they have for a Blimp..
Yo!! what was that real fast PLAIN, tha  never mind I got it...C-----CONCORDE...!! Ha Simple HUH???

"Today Is The 18th Day Of September In The Year Of Our Lord 2012."

It Is Now Post Time
We're Off..You know Plain, I have at least a few excuses for being awol. What the fuck are your excuses, uhmmmm jeee, I was a goofin with the Toads and somebody told me that a 4 inch putt was a gimmee, but Babe said, no fuckin way man, and Butch said well what about a three inch putt, and Monk picked up the ball and said, I'm takin my balls and going home..and Floyd said, look there are a bunch of irate hackers heading our way..Yeah, lame excuse Plain....keep swingin those clubs baby...I know someday I am going to read about you Toads and your shenanigans...NO GET OFF OF YOUR KNEES, I AM NOT JOINING...
Yo! The Ville is getting a lot of visitors, maybe because Plain and Simple were out doing what Plain and Simple do...and McWHOEVERTHEFUCKHEIS took over the controls..
Little known fact, take over the controls, came from the Wright brothers, yep, Orville and Wilbur themselves.. They were down on The Outer Banks of North Carolina, in a place called Kill Devil Hills, not KittyHawk, as the historians would want you to believe, now they had the first airplane ready for takeoff on one of the sand dunes that is about 600 ft. high because it was ripe for takin off that day. The winds were about 100 m.p.h. blowing straight into the ocean....Now these winds on these sand dunes in the Outer Banks are very unpredictable...The name of the airplane was DRUM ROLL EASY......................................................................."THE FIRST AIRPLAIN"   Well the winds were really whipping this day my friends, and it was Wilburs turn to fly..,,but Wilbur was a little sick in the stomach, so he asked Orville to go ahead and take a shot...Orville said fuck you, you ain't pullin that sick shit again, just because it is really windy.  I aint takin those controls.  With this Wilbur hauls the fuck off with a roundhouse right to Orvilles head and DOWN GOES ORVILLE..Orville started biting Wilburs shoe and got a lot of sand in his mouth, yep, it is a little known fact...The next thing you know old Jebs a millionaire...OOPS sorry that is another story..The next thing you know Old Jebs a Millionaire, what the fuck man...anyway as these two idiots are beating the shit out of each other, this local dude by the name of Samuel L. Smedley jumped into "THE FIRST AIRPLAINE, AND YELLED, I AM TAKING OVER THE CONTROLS...Well let me tell ya, fuckin Samuel and "THE FIRST AIRPLAIN TOOK OFF OVER THE ATLANTIC,  and they were never heard from again....Orville and Wilbur made up and built "THE SECOND AIRPLAINE" and the rest is history...but what people never really knew was that Samuel,L.Smedley was the first man to fly...Well second if you count SUPERMAN... Don't forget you heard it here first on Plain and Simple!!!!!!!!  What am I about 8.....

"Today Is The 17th Day Of September In The Year Of Our Lord 2012."

It Is Now Post Time.
We are off....OK, a little refresher course...Thursday, out  of town, 5:30 wake up to meet a tractor trailer in York Pa...pick up 8 AM VODKADAY morning, easy day, load up at 8 onto the Yunk by 1..party at Turners for Jimmy McBrides son who went off and joined the Navy.. OK, fucking truck shows up at 2PM.. Ya think I was a little pissed, I got a crew headed by none other than Phil The Nut waiting back in New Jermany, the truck doesn't get there until 8PM...Those guys worked till 10PM..think there is a trucking outfit that ain't gettin paid...OK back to the Yunk at 7PM.. into the party, work clothes and a I don't give a shit attitude..When one Johnny McFarlands, rips my hat off and sticks this fuckin Rocky lookin hat on me, and tells me....I BOUGHT THAT FOR YOU TODAY!!!!..OK John thank you, I am sure it looks good...HEY YOU LOOK LIKE ROCKY...I'm thinkin I feel like Rocky after the day I just put in...I say come on John (Johnny was a Marine) let's go in the back they are having a party for McBrides son, now I have the door open to the party and he yells,  WHY THEY HAVING A PARTY...I said the kid is going in the service...He yells...NO HE AIN'T HE JOINED THE FUCKIN NAVY..SLAM!!! the door shut....laughin my balls off..Wind up in front of Stebors house yellin YO ADRIAN!!!!She told me to keep quite, that I reminded her of her father..HA!!!
Saturday morning headin back to New Jermany, and as I drive down Ripka, lo and behold who is coming out his door...none other than the Polish Prince himself Butchie Witkowski...YO!! where you goin..?? uhm back to Jersey.. You wanna get breakfast??Sure jump in...HEY NICE HAT..Thanks Butch,,,about 12 AM Sunday, I was like Butch can we go home...??  This is after breakfast, Harrah's Chester whackin away on a poker machine for 6 hours and finally,  another bout at Turners...Sunday morning I can't get up,. I really feel like Rocky...finally 2PM sneakin down the steps ..YO ERN....Hey Butchie..THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD.   I might be and don't know it....Over to Phils can't make it too the bunker...HEY ERN WANNA GO OVER THE ERLTON AND HAVE A FEW BEERS..?? What the fuck, why not.....Well here it is Monday afternoon the Simpleton, has a hat smashed over his head and a tooth missing, it is wrapped up in my pocket...don't ask...I gotta go to the dentist.....

TODAY'S ARE THE 14TH, 15TH, and 16TH DAYS OF SEPTEMBER, 2012 A.D.

Well, I guess the boys are out doing what boys do on the weekend.......We have a Post, Post Vodka Day MIA....We have an esteemed Whacker....MIA.......We have a weekend Cinderella......MIA.......We have a K...K   Katey MIA......We have all the citizens of the VILLE MIA, cept for one.......The critters are also gone......Maybe a change of weather has the Hibernation Factor kicking in......So lets see what we can come up with...............

These two are busy doing their thing...

I am getting this RV for the Ville and Simples traveling with Phil on the long hauls.

Simple is redoing the VILLE Hooch and this will be his first purchase......Sweetttttttttttttt.....

Here are his first two guests......Plain should like this set up.......Dave, not so much......

Let see if they come around for a Cameo..................Later

"Today Is The 13th Day Of September In The Year Of Our Lord 2012..

It Is Now Post Time.
We're Off...Well we got rid of Saddam, we got rid of Kadaffy Duck, we got rid of Mubarak, and LOOK WHAT WE GOT!!! Some more Americans getting killed and some scum bags desecrating our flag..Whatcha gonna do Obuma, Whatcha gonna do?????....ARE YOU READY!!!.....Sign over top of my door reads as follows:
CHIEF MILITARY ADVISOR SIMPLE......Lance Corporal in rank only..
Lance Corporal Simple!!, (this is the janitor talking to me)...Yes Sir...Lance Corporal, the President needs your advise...Tell him I am eating my cheerios, be right there...Meere get your fuckin eyeballs out of my cereal...
Walkin on in the Oral Office...Hello Mr. P.!! Good Morning My Main Man Simple..How are you today?? Pretty good Mr. P.. What up??  We have a situation in Egypt, where they killed some Americans over some stupid movie about Muhammad.., and they are burning our flag and hunting down Americans...can you take care of this...???  Sure Mr. P..walking out of the Oral Office, what the fuck are those stains on the floor.. Hey Hillary, Billy Goat been runnin around in here lately??..Your Goat Simple??  No your husband asshole...
Hello, message to all Americans in the Middle East, get out, in 48 hours...you have been warned..
Hello, message to all Armed Forces...RED ALERT!!!....Invasion ready ...OK, go conquer the Middle East, let the Israelis take the point,,,, when you get done in about 24 hours, report back in, see how many of those morons are left to work our oil fields, and docks for shipping...The rest of them send to Cuba..., or Hell!!! It is up to the Israeli's
Mr. P.!! Yes Lance Corporal Simple..The war is over, we now have a few more states and a lot of oil...It is called the United States of Arabia..I gotta go my cheerios are getting soggy....CHEERS!!! and to all you new citizens and oil field workers welcome to your new country, you can call me Lance Corporal Simple, or just shut the fuck up and work..either way, don't much matter to me..
and welcome to your new country, this is your flag, burn it die....Start pumpin mother fucker we need some more oil......Mission Accomplished.....

"Today Is The 12th Day Of September In The Year Of Our Lord 2012."

It Is Now Post Time
We're Off...The day after.... Sheople love to use that expression..You ever try and think,  if you could rethink, what you did yesterday, how many times would you change it, and how many times would you let it stand..moot point..can't do a damn thing about it.. It's dead and gone, whatever the fuck that means..Dead is dead gone is gone..Little known fact, some sheople are Grateful Dead Fans..I guess they will also be grateful when they are dead...who knows, maybe dead and gone is real..Personally I think Dead as we know it stinks...you know like one of Coglin's Laws.  Bury The Dead, they stink up the joint..Dead, as in meaning Dead, like you ain't here anymore, ahhhhh!! but are you somewhere?? You ever see one of those ghost shows on reality TV..Let me set it up for you...Dark room their eyes are shining, something goes BUMP, and one of those idiots yell,,DID YOU SEE THAT!!FUCK NO, NOBODY SAW IT,!! Like what were they supposed to see, a ghost, or spirit, come on man, that would be the biggest story since Christ...Yet people watch it, waiting to see what a ghost?  There would be shit all over the room, as each and every one of them,  ran the fuck over each other trying to get the fuck out of there..
Saw where one of our honorable's from New Jersey (Rep. Anderson), spent 32,000.00 on a trip too Scotland for him and his family...took it out of campaign funds, it was alright though because his wife, a well known lawyer is in charge of his ethics committee.  I really gotta laugh, are we really this stupid, why do we take it..You know why, pay check to pay check, don't rock the boat baby..We are getting by, we owe, we owe but we are getting by.. Gotta nice house, most of us will never really own, especially the next generation.  Got a nice car, might own that after 7 years and 3000.00 in repair bills..oh yeah, those pension funds...OH YEAH!! beware the team that makes you money..take your money and run son...Once again, back to the greatest Country on earth, we have freedom..So does, Canada, England, Belgium, Iceland, Norway, Germany, even Australia way down under..So I ain't really sure anymore about THE GREATEST COUNTRY ON EARTH..Look around do you see the stress in this society that I see...I look around, I see a lot,. and it won't change as long as we have to pay for our elected officials and their families trips to foreign lands, and our young men and women have to go to foreign lands to fight their wars.....HEY IS SCOTLAND FREE!! BETTER ASK BRAVEHEART!!!!!!!!!!!!!  FREEDOM!!!!  It's an illussion sheople.....

"Today Is The 11th Day Of September In The Year Of Our Lord 2012."

What can I say that has already not been said..a Day that will live in infamy, along with many other days in my lifetime...
TO ALL THE DECEASED VICTIMS "REST IN PEACE"
TO ALL OF THE VICTIMS, AND THEIR LOVED ONES, ALIVE AND DECEASED YOU ARE IN OUR PRAYERS.

TO THE COWARDS THAT PERPETRATED THIS HEINOUS CRIME AGAINST INNOCENT MEN, WOMEN AND CHILDREN, THE U.S.A. WILL GIVE YOU WHAT YOU DESERVE, IF BY CHANCE WE MISS YOU, OUR MAKER WILL DO THE REST... YOU WILL ALL BE BURIED IN HELL..

TODAY IS SATURDAY. SEPTEMBER 8TH, 2012 A.D.

Well I guess this Swabbie will have to take care of the Post again this weekend because the two JarHeads are out hob-nobbing with the Country Club Set.  I am sure Plain is lobbying for a tee-time and Simple is explaining just how good they are and he will even caddy for them gratis.......Although they had to pass a very stringent test to be able to hit the sod on that course......I was used as a reference and I had to send these pics along to keep my name clear::

Plain thought Simple just had water in his bottle...LOL  LOL....Today he decided on Money Rum to celebrate his good fortune.........Shouldn't have lit that cigar..........

PETA was on sight because of the warning some one sent about Simple and his Tee........The don't understand the relationship that Simple has with Sammy...............

And finally, Simple after a couple of hours at the 19th Hole decided he would go find the whackers and say how sorry he was for getting them rejected on their application............He really did try but to no avail.....

So what did we learn from their Friday and Saturday adventures????????????????????


NOTHING

"Today Is The 7th Day Of September In The Year Of Our Lord 2012."

It Is Now Post Time
We're Off...First VODKADAY in September, should be a memorable one..gotta watch what I say, but will see Plain and Streebs sometime today, along with the rest of the Toads. Toading in the Yunk, and you wonder how sayings or cliches start..The whole language is a cliche, just listen to ball players when they do an interview..It's not about me, it is about the team...We have to all pull together..He is a great coach..We will get that straightened out..I am working hard (WORKING???) Did you hear an umpire yell "WORK BALL!!"  The Line is looking good..He played a heck of a game..We will get that fixed and get after it next week...One game at a time..Can't get ahead of ourselves..He works harder than any ball player I have ever been around..(WORKS???)..CLICHE DAY HERE AT THE VILLE!! A little different take though, do cliche questions, there are millions of them...   Did we do it before?? If it is a cliche that is evident..

What is wrong with you?? Nothing.( that is usually the answer and a lie) everything is fucking wrong with me,  you got about three days to listen,  if not don't ask, that is the right answer..

Got a minute...??  A minute!! Yeah your times up..

How many times do I have to say it??  If you are talking to me or Floyd probably, anywhere from nine too twenty..

You going?? Going where??


You talking to me?? Hey Dave, I like the 5 horse.. You Talkin to me?? Yeah, my man I like the 5..You Talkin to me?? Yeah, Dave I'm Talkin too you, I like the 5..You Talkin to me?? What the fuck Dave, yeah you...That's the horses name you Simpleton..LOL!!!

You coming back?? Yeah haahaahhhahha!!

Where did everybody go?? You showed up Simple, you can empty a room faster than a grenade..

Is that your ex-wife???  WHERE??????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

You want another drink??  Your kiddin right?? they are both good...

Well bring some on, have a good day, don't know if I will be back this way...

"Today Is The 6th Day Of September In The Year Of Our Lord 2012"

It Is Now Post Time.
We're Off.....Sixth Of September, looking around, don't think anything is significant about this day, just back to school bullshit...Big deal go back to school.., it ain't a prison anymore, actually most kids seem to like it, God Bless Them.. Football kicked off last night (gag).. really a waste of time, unless you are holding some action..because there isn't much on the field.
I was thinkin about Austrailia, why?? I don't know. I don't know why I think about half the shit I think about, half the time...The General  WHERE THE FUCK IS THE GENERAL!!! thinks I should seek mental help..HA!! they would throw the proverbial key down the drain, and no one would ever hear my Simple musings except Plain, he would be in the ward next too mine.
Speaking of Plain,  I guess he is out whackin his balls again today, what a life that toad and them other toads have...NO NO,, get off of your knees, I am not joining the toads..Nothing personal, just got too much too do to be a toad..Little Known Fact....Toads were first thought to be a species of frog, though they are reptilian in nature (Louis The Lizard), they are not frogs..Frogs have edible legs, have you ever seen Toads Legs, (go back Walnut Lane Goof Course Any Day Of The Week)  they are not edible..although the Toad and The Frog may be cousins, they are two distinct and ugly species. I had a friend who had a white African Frog,  the skin was so thin you could see inside it...I used to stare at it, and it would stare at me, and I could feel my heart starting to beat faster, and then I could see Froggys, yep that was his name, heart starting to beat faster, so I would pull away and so would he..Then we would start staring at each other again, you should try it sometime great exercise for the heart..., especially when my friend sent me to frog starers annonymous, yep it is addictive..You can purschase said Frog in Uganda...OK reptiles it will be,,,,let's see if anybody visits if not fuck it.I will do it alone..I am used to playing with myself...A-Z Reptiles..

A-Alligator
B-What the fuck stuck already.
C-Crocodile  as in Dundee...
D-Dinasaurs...they be no more..
E-Don't even go there Plain
F-White Skinned African Staring Frog, I knew one personally..
G-Gila Monsters HA!! how ya like that one!!!
Bring on the long tongued bug eatin cute little reptiles you know...see ya....

"Today Is The 5th Of September In The Year Of Our Lord 2012."

It Is Now Post Time.
We're Off..Nah, this can't be happening..What am I doing in line with a coat and tie on, grouped up with 70 other boys, and somebody in a cape and gown down to her ankles with a giant bib prodding us up the steps, yellling stay in line..Wait!! wasn't I just playing baseball up Joel Cook Schoolyard..Who is this scary looking creature with a pointer in her hand saying, OK, everybody together Christopher Columbus discovered America....OH NO!! Little Simple is back at St. John The Baptist Parachial Prison For Kids...OH NO!!! when did summer end..!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SIMPLE, SIMPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!What What What Meere???? You are having a nightmare, you are sweating and jumping all around the bunker yelling ABCDEFGHIJK!!!OK, Meere, I am alright (sure I am). How can I be alright the last thing I watched on TV was some jerk off politician telling all the sheople exactly what every othe jerk off politician ahead of him had said...AND WE AS AMERICANS WILL ONCE AGAIN RISE BEFORE THE ASHES AS WE HAVE DONE SO MANY TIMES BEFORE..!!!YAYAYYAYAYYYYAYYAY!!!! You Moronic bunch of assholes cheering for these scum bags that put you in  a position, where our young men and women are getting killed in another far away land, in another meaningless war, you can read all about it go to page 5 in your daily news paper..The economy of the richest land on this planet is 16 trillion in debt...16 TRILLION!! we as human beings can't fathom what a trillion amounts too.They refuse to tear down the tax laws and make it a society rights too keep enough money too provide for their families..Time and time again I have stated that anyone that makes under a hundred thousand a year should not, SHOULD NOT YOU MEALY MOUTHED BUNCH OF SCAMMERS!!! pay any taxes, they need that too survive..Hey the fat big time governor of new jermany was a headline speaker,, HEY TUBBY, THE GARDEN STATE HAS A 10% UMEMPLOYMENT RATE...OK Simple, you know you cannot get heated up over politics.., and in effect, I am not overheated by politics, they are there forever and the politicians that dictate our lives (OBUMA,,,BUSHIE BOY "THE WAR IS OVER", CLINTON, SUCK A LITTLE HARDER MONICA,  HILLARY, WHAT A JOKE!!! DID I SAY OBUMA!!, WEINER, CHECK ME OUT, CHRISTIE, SHUT THE FUCK UP, THE DUDE THAT SAYS GET RAPED PREGNANT, SO WHAT!! EDWARDS, DIE WIFEY GOT ME A CHICKIE..) Got the picture..They are slobs and blood suckers, but what really irks this Simple Fellow is the jerk off sheople that follow their every word...they make me more sick than the politicians...I could sit here at 66 and say they deserve what they get, and they do...but they are not left with a lot of choices..this is the best country ever devised..but mark these Simple words....It will not stay that way..they are slowly destroying it from within and the Sheople cheer them on..Fuckin amazing...I am actually thinking of running for office...I should be assassinated within Ohhhhh a day or two...UH-OH I brought down the thunder today, wait till Plain visits these haunts...Mr. Plain, will have a few choice words..me I got a couple too...FUCK THEM ALL!!!!!

"Today Is The 4th Day Of September In The Year Of Our Lord 2012."

It Is Now Post Time.
We're Off...Is it over?? Did the Labor Day Weekend End?? Is it safe too say summer is over?? I dare say I believe it is...WOW McPicture has created a Ville on his own..It is almost a coup..I know Plain and Strebor would join up and throw the old Simpleton to the rhino's..that was some good stuff Jim, and yes I have been hiding out..I hate that fuckin holiday, it takes away from my personality of which I have little to begin with.. The last thing I remember I was singin to Babe that    """"HE AIN'T HEAVYYYY HEEEE'S MY EDDDYYY!!! and him sayin he just wanted to go home.. so home it was, locked down, red alert, IT IS OVER!! IT IS OVER!!! No more summer, back to school, the Ville lives on, and so does Simple, barely..ONE LONG VODKA DAY!!! but a  great way to not see labor day or any other day for that matter...Great job everybody...HATOONA MATTADA!! WELCOME BACK SIMPLE, WELCOME BACK..

TODAY IS MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 3RD, 2012 A.D. POST VODKA DAY TO THE THIRD POWER

Okay.........LABOR DAY............And no sign of the Simple One.....He is absolutely MIA.......

Oh where, oh where has our little man gone
Oh where, oh where can he be
With his hair cut short and his clothes cut long
Oh where, oh where can he be?

He could be trying to get back to the VILLE, as we know he loves to drive in the Holiday Traffic......I suspect he put this sign up for the end of the Summer revelers.....He has his choice of labor day beauties to bring home for the critters, which one will he choose>

Which ever one I am sure there will be some funny stories to go along with the end of Summer.....Maybe this will be the year he can pack it in and get back to helping Plain carrying his balls and helping the Whackers fulfill their dreams of a hole in one......A good luck charm he is............LOL

Well as we wind down this Dreary day, lets give Simple two more species for residency in the Ville.....

All Sleep well  tonight knowing Simple is out there somewhere guarding something for anybody that needs guarding.....................................

TAPS...................Just in case he gets back to his roots...............