Thursday, July 21, 2011
"Today Is The 21st Day Of July In The Year Of Our Lord 2011."
Mornin, Creatures, yeah there are a lot of them here at the Ville, but when you think about it, that original Ville had a lot of creatures also...I was wondering whatever happened to Big Foot. I think the original Big Foot was Bozo The Clown, but then they started sighting these really hairy, tall guys in the Great Northwestern part of the Country, that sorta were a cross between a Gorilla and a Human.. Sorta a like a missing link..Little Known Fact, when Bozo found out that they were calling these creatures Big Foot, he sued the news media for 100 million dollars, yep he had a patent on Big Feet. Bozo's feet were so big that he had a funny walk sorta like stumbling, you know like on VODKADAY. He literally tripped over his own feet, and that is where that saying originated. Bozo's law suit was thrown out, due too the fact all the lawyers thought he was just clowning around. Yep, that is where that saying originated.. Anyway putting Bozo's problems aside till later, Big Foot hit the papers and was soon to be called the American Yeti..The one disconcerning fact about this creature is, that he has never been caught. Don't you think that a 9 foot, hairy, man looking ape, in The Great Nortwestern Part of the United States would have been caught by now. What the fuck they killed Bin Laden.. I think people like too think there are creatures out there that we know exist but they cannot be caught and remain a mystery.. That is alright, as there are creatures in folklore throughout the history of mankind, but until they capture or at least have photographic documentation of Big Foot, Sasquatch, Yeti or Abominable Snowmen, Bozo will remain the top Big Foot in The Big Top.. Creature Double Feature bring them in one and all. How about the Jersey Devil, some people say it's me. Maybe it is, maybe it ain't, but that's what makes creature believing fun. Have some fun.. Me I am going to work...
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Lot of vacationers strolling around the cleaned up Ville today (thanks to me and Slat or Blat or one of those assholes). Of course the citizens they have nothing too say..Strebor probably sleeping. McCool probably trying to figure out what day it is..Plain whackin off again..Mchugh what the fuck happened to Mchugh..I think he shot himself in the ass. I gotta get the General commentating, he started this shit and then jumps rank..Getting tired of your shit General. I don't care if you do out rank this creature. I know you are creepin around in here, you told me so in Church at least say Hi to Plain..and Simple if you want.. Sorry about that little outburst. I must have lost my mind for a moment.
Bozo checked in, the lawsuit is still in progress in the Patent Office in Washington. Bozo said it is a slow process as no one works there anymore. If you want a patent he said go to Ringling Brothers Barnum and Baily Circus you got a better shot of getting something done there, than in Washington DC. This Clown is Down He don't fuck Around.
Well I'd tell ya it's hot out there but I don't feel like hearing no shit. But I'm pretty sure you guys know it's hot out.And yes we went and wacked are Balls again today, and God speed we will be out there tomorrow.
And Simple I didn't know Bonzo was big foot. No wonder he was always clowing around. But you say you don't know if there really is a big Foot. Rember that night on Paoli Ave we only had half a can each we had just got there and that thing crossed the road we both saw it and started telling everyone else and they were like you assholes and that went on for like 5 minutes and we were pointing to right where we saw it......There laughing at us then this thing like 8 foot tall all hairy walked across the road again and all those tough guys were yelling lets get the fuck out of here.If I would have known it was Nonzo I woulda stayed. Nods and walks away.
And I meant Bonzo not Nonzo it is a lil know fact that Nonzo was Big foots sister her nic name was lil feets.You heard it here on Slain and Pimple first.
Oh Btw guys say a Prayer for one Chippy Charles Guller he passed Friday and was laid to rest today,was a good man Chippy and we had alot of laughs together may he rest in Peace.
Far to the North where the winter storms whip through the woods, you
will find a piece of land called the Pines. Here you see dark forests with deep woods surrounded by mighty Pine Trees.
Nowadays this Pine Cone covered land is very hot and dry and not a good climate for the elusive Troll. As the climate gradually warmed and the water slowly retreated to the South the Troll followed in its wake. Looking at this Land and finding it to be magnificent, they considered themselves to be Its first inhabitants of the Plain and Simple Ville. One Simple settled there and named it the Ville. They called themselves Yunks (Men of Manayunk).It did not take Plain and Simple long, however, to realize that on this land there were various other creatures hiding out in the forests. Goats, Tree Rats, Meres, Spiders, Slavs and Blats and the occasional Baboon. People did not know what these creatures were, but they were generally believed to Royal pains in the ass, and possibly have supernatural powers.
The Trolls would come out of their hiding-places only after sun-set, and they would disappear before the morning sun arose. Direct exposure to the sun could cause them to crack. On occasion the trolls would evidently forget to hide from the sun or be teased and taunted by the other creatures in the Ville. The Pine formations can today be found in various places in Shamong with troll-like features. The Trolls were mostly seen on bright moonlit nights, or during stormy nights that could frighten about anyone who happened to be outdoors at that time except for the resident creatures. The trolls had very distinct features. They had long crooked noses, only four fingers and toes on each limb, possibly from a run in with the menagerie, and most of them had long bushy tails.
Some trolls were giants, and others were small. There were stories of two-Headed as well as three-headed trolls, and even a few had only one eye in
The middle of their wrinkled foreheads. Others had trees and rough moss-like
Growth all over their heads and noses.Although they were shaggy and rough-haired, and most looked frightening,They were also known to be good-natured and naive. So naive in fact that even the Simple Shamonger could,on occasion, treat them to a Vodka and Sprite or a Captain and Coke. Maybe some Pepperoni and Cheese chasers. Stories about such encounters are common in the local Liquor establishments.Most trolls lived to be hundreds of years old. However, because of the trolls are extremely shy in nature, their true origin, their lifestyle or what Surprises they might pull have always been a mystery.
The ability to transform themselves into different creatures, especially the ones they would see, counted among the trolls many supernatural skills. The fairy maidens called "Hulder" - could transform into incredibly attractive young ladies. However, they could not get rid of their tails. The poor lonely Shamonger, who was lured to Pines by these fairies, would usually check for tails on their new-found beauties. He has ever since this incident checked for tails on anyone he was with. The wrath of the trolls was boundless. It was therefore considered very Important not to make them your enemy. If a Piney did provoke a troll, his Life might be subject to Spider Bites or harmful sickness, or worse things could happen, such as a bad night at the Sugar House. On the other hand, a good relationship with the trolls could be very rewarding, like the privilege of caddying for Plain and Monk from the next village by crossing one the bridges that the Troll would frequent.Now, even in these modern times it is well advised to keep a good standing withThe trolls, since you never know when you will meet one yourself. The next Time you go to the Pines or cross a bridge, just remember, they probably mean no harm. But be aware. In the twilight hours you are no longer alone.Then it is only you and all the trolls.Ergo, always be alert when you put the trash out.....LOL
Not sleeping; mourning the passing of one of my daughter's beloved pets; one of the sweetest little cats ever to grace our lives, "Ginger". So sad; just not thinking straight right now. Very upset. Won't be around too much today so keep P & S ville going. BBL. Plain sorry to say I don't remember Chippy Guller but said a prayer for him.
Yep, Chippy was one of Fairmounts best. RIP
Strebor Chippy Guller was at the house on Cinnaminson many times. RIP My Man..I hate too hear that news. I knew he was sick and I knew he had passed. He was a character. Met him in 1960 and kinda hung out off and on through high school, always got along great with him. Great sense of humor and a belief that he could graduate Roman Catholic without ever opening a book.. My Man Chip made it.. See you on the clouds Chippy...
On a much lighter note great story about the trolls J Mc but I get a distinct impression that you are trying to scare me out of the Ville. News to anyone listening. I don't scare easy..Like I said some people actually call me the Jersey Devil.. One never knows does one. I will be troll hunting with Blat and Slat that should be fun..Tell them we are going Trolling and they will be rowing a boat through the pines...
Strebor so sorry to hear about Ginger, give your Daughter my condolencences, I know how bad you both feel I had to put my dog down last year. She was 17 years old, and she is on my mantel peace as we speak, her ashes anyway, and in all truthfullness it was one of the toughest things I have ever done.
Sorry Strebor..that is the down side to having the unconditional love they give. Like Plain said it is one the hardest thing an owner has to do. Best Regards.
Thank you all for your kind words. All pet owners know how hard it is to loose our pets, who really are part of our families.
Yep so true so true are pets never fail to love us no matter what.It's why Simple , Greeny, Sammy,Mere and Goat get along so well.
Plain, I loves ya! You made me smile:)
Glad ya smiled Strebor, the way I look at it is God must of had a few kids that needed them more than us.And I love ya too.
What a great way to look at it Plain.
Never got too meet Ginger but over that rainbow bridge she has a lot of company. I don't think there are any of us, that has not been affected by the love of a pet in this life. I hear some people say, aww it is only a dog. Nothing could be further from the truth. That was a friend and a part of the family..Heart breaking when you lose them. Hey Strebs lets get Mim and the kids a new one. If they want something right away I have a Mere Kat they can have. Maybe Chippy needed a pet too cheer him up, one never know does one. Hang in here Strebor we'll try and keep you laughing....That is the toughest part about most life, it ends...
What the fuck, we on the right time??????????????
Hey dig this. A true love of mine one Danielle, Stebor and Plain have met her, turned me onto a really weird creature. (well she turns me on more than that), but that story ain't gone on here. I always knew the horseshoe crab was a left over relic, but what I did'nt know and Danielle told me was that their blood is worth 15,000.00 a quart. Wait till you hear this, Drum Roll Easy.........Their blood is blue, (sorta like the royal family gag gag). I honestly never knew a creature could have blue blood. It is use in making some kinda medicine and there is only about a vile in each crab, and the casualty rate is like 90%. How about that shit........Now there is a creature.
"Stay Out Of Harms Way My Friends."
Farewell too Chippy and Ginger have a blast on the clouds together..
TAPS.........
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